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taxlor

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taxlor

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  • Number of visits : 370
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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taxlor's page activity

Visits<b>15Erik</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 2:22am<b>JohnzSexyMamas11</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 1:46am

taxlor's FML badges

Inception

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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taxlor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28816) - you deserved it (8970) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (31418)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18273) - you deserved it (62883)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69984) - you deserved it (6583)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML

#14575088
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17945) - you deserved it (31543)

On 01/14/2011 at 4:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to class with my bag packed for a weekend trip when it began to vibrate violently. Stopping mid-lecture, the professor approached me and asked politely if I could turn off my cell phone as I was disturbing the other 150 pupils in the class. It was my personal vibrator. FML

#13462188
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10605) - you deserved it (42817)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38413) - you deserved it (2690)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

#9135717
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32808) - you deserved it (4691)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:51pm - animals - by Adam (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21261) - you deserved it (2438)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51914) - you deserved it (8117)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9516) - you deserved it (48875)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML

#6354793
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37126) - you deserved it (2654)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by Grad2010 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a big exam. 20 minutes in I could feel people turning round looking at me. I ignored them at first, but towards the one hour mark it got more distracting. I stood up and yelled "Why's everyone staring at me!" I got kicked out. Turns out I was seated directly in front of the clock. FML

#5563519
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8893) - you deserved it (45407)

On 09/30/2009 at 9:36am - misc - by failfailfail - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my fiancé, his mother, my father and I went out to celebrate my birthday and our recent engagement. After dinner, my father and future mother-in-law revealed to us that they had secretly been dating and were talking about also getting married. Anybody want cake? FML

#4996665
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45685) - you deserved it (2643)

On 09/02/2009 at 10:47am - love - by BDayssuck (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my Swedish friend for some lines to impress this swedish girl I met at an expat party he took me to. I practised them all evening before I met her. I told her my feelings, and she scowled. Apparently I had wished the devil upon her - after asking if i could ejaculate on her face. FML

#2964628
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50557) - you deserved it (21336)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:57am - intimacy - by Dirtyswede (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)



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