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taxlor

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taxlor

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 429
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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taxlor's page activity

Visits<b>15Erik</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 2:22am<b>JohnzSexyMamas11</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 1:46am

taxlor's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of taxlor's badges

taxlor's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

#19937636
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5440) - you deserved it (47843)

On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27281) - you deserved it (8422)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58963) - you deserved it (3202)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8495) - you deserved it (55069)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to chase my naked brothers around my house for twenty minutes, trying to get them to take a bath, all while they were chasing my best friend around yelling, "IT'S WIENER TIME!" FML

#19076647
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25989) - you deserved it (2642)

On 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm - kids - by ShylaMarie - Canada

Today, I got into a fist-fight with a wasp, aka a Nazi helicopter. Despite swiping at it with ninja-like skills, I lost. FML

#19040540
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7931) - you deserved it (25532)

On 02/10/2012 at 9:13am - animals - by Stung (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29233) - you deserved it (9052) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18041) - you deserved it (32415)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18531) - you deserved it (63386)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70119) - you deserved it (6587)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML

#14575088
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17974) - you deserved it (31585)

On 01/14/2011 at 4:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to class with my bag packed for a weekend trip when it began to vibrate violently. Stopping mid-lecture, the professor approached me and asked politely if I could turn off my cell phone as I was disturbing the other 150 pupils in the class. It was my personal vibrator. FML

#13462188
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10766) - you deserved it (43158)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38517) - you deserved it (2694)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

#9135717
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33537) - you deserved it (4780)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:51pm - animals - by Adam (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21328) - you deserved it (2447)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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