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taxlor

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taxlor

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  • Number of visits : 295
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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taxlor's page activity

Visits<b>JohnzSexyMamas11</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 1:46am

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taxlor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22396) - you deserved it (6699)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML

#20432089
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22930) - you deserved it (4780)

On 12/30/2012 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Saarland)

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15142) - you deserved it (35011)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26952) - you deserved it (3443)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML

#20013286
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22479) - you deserved it (3859)

On 08/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by ice cream dude - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML

#20013286
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22479) - you deserved it (3859)

On 08/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by ice cream dude - United States (Colorado)

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25995) - you deserved it (8214)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57413) - you deserved it (3106)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8440) - you deserved it (54855)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to chase my naked brothers around my house for twenty minutes, trying to get them to take a bath, all while they were chasing my best friend around yelling, "IT'S WIENER TIME!" FML

#19076647
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23929) - you deserved it (2467)

On 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm - kids - by ShylaMarie - Canada

Today, I got into a fist-fight with a wasp, aka a Nazi helicopter. Despite swiping at it with ninja-like skills, I lost. FML

#19040540
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7370) - you deserved it (24225)

On 02/10/2012 at 9:13am - animals - by Stung (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27403) - you deserved it (8695) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17327) - you deserved it (31332)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17487) - you deserved it (61376)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69823) - you deserved it (6568)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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