taoxyeuxmay

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taoxyeuxmay

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3484
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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taoxyeuxmay's page activity

Visits<b>ken29</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 7:09am<b>Adeptus_Astartes</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 12:29am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 2:48pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:05am<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:44pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 7:43am<b>tacojauns</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 12:28pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 5:33pm<b>kjblack</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 9:38am<b>mik3r</b> - the 02/28/2013 at 8:19pm<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 4:37pm<b>Fentown</b> - the 05/09/2010 at 9:45am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 11/27/2009 at 11:14am<b>diablonegro</b> - the 11/19/2009 at 5:05am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/10/2009 at 4:57pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/19/2009 at 4:26pm<b>bpack</b> - the 08/11/2009 at 3:13pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 8:48pm

taoxyeuxmay's FML badges

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taoxyeuxmay's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my boyfriend upset because my best friend has begun stripping to pay for school. His response was, "Where and what time does she work?" FML

by notcool / 12/15/2009 at 4:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was taking the final exam for one of my classes. The teacher came over to my desk, grabbed my test and ripped it in half. Then he grabbed my hand and read the note I had written on it to remind myself to pay rent. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2009 at 2:36pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my furnace and all of my heating systems broke down. A fridge is 3 degrees Celsius; it is now 2 degrees Celsius in my house. I would be warmer in my fridge. FML

by FrozenD / 12/12/2009 at 11:55am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my boyfriend invited me for dinner to meet his parents. Turns out his stepmother is my gynecologist. FML

by Twiddle / 12/07/2009 at 2:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

by IB6UB9 / 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm / United States / Love

Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML

by snottyface / 09/25/2009 at 11:47pm / United States / Health

Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML

by Needasafe1234 / 09/25/2009 at 11:24am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML

by Lulu / 09/16/2009 at 10:23pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me to come to her college, so I did. I was greeted by the campus police who told me to stop harassing her because she no longer wants to be with me. Then they told me I was no longer welcome on campus and hereby banned. She used campus police to dump me. FML

by Wow / 09/03/2009 at 9:45pm / United States / Love

Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

by NoCookForYou / 08/22/2009 at 2:29am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my grandma went to get birthday gifts for my twin sister and me. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute? 'cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML

by twingirl / 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my brother clean his room. While putting clothes away, I found a box of thongs. They were mine. FML

by haha247 / 08/14/2009 at 10:09am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

by bubbalicious / 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

by JPF / 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous