tangus

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Offline (the 11/06/2014 at 6:58am)

tangus

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 277
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tangus's FML badges

I moderated this!

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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tangus's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my son mutter to himself, "If Hitler could do it to that many people, so could I..." Anyone recommend a good psychiatrist? FML

by failure / 11/02/2014 at 3:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting a taxi from his place. FML

by rockytrolley / 10/08/2014 at 5:01am / Cyprus / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend put her hand on my abs and confessed that she was glad I'd secretly started working out. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I've been constipated for three weeks. FML

by çapousse2904 / 09/12/2014 at 1:45am / Health

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

by younggirl101 / 08/05/2014 at 12:51pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

by boob sisters / 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, after nearly three weeks of hard work, I finally completed my best drawing yet, a self-portrait. I was incredibly excited to take it to class tomorrow. That is, until I came home from a walk later on, only to find my brother had drawn a stick figure on it, wanking into my face. FML

by ~~~ / 06/29/2014 at 1:08pm / Australia (South Australia) / Work

Today, I was talking to my boss about dogs and cats. I'm a dog person; he's a cat person. He told me that he likes cats better, because they are laid back and don't do anything all day. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Just like you?" FML

by Respect101 / 06/25/2014 at 8:20pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I looked at my bank balance. It read $1.23. That's higher than it usually is. FML

by amused / 06/23/2014 at 5:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Money

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

by LoveGlove / 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

by chanclepants / 01/27/2010 at 8:35am / Intimacy

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

by Concussed / 01/17/2010 at 1:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health