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tambo5135

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tambo5135

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 647
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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tambo5135's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was working, someone came in and attempted to purchase GTA 5 with a medical marijuana card. FML

#20892589
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38054) - you deserved it (3040)

On 09/23/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I started shaking my son's Little Bill doll in frustration, as the batteries weren't working. My nosy neighbor saw through the window and called the cops. They wouldn't believe me and now the whole neighborhood thinks I'm a child abuser. FML

#20892490
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50948) - you deserved it (7254)

On 09/23/2013 at 12:44am - kids - by baddad (man) - United States

Today, I joked with my boss about calling in sick to work tomorrow with food poisoning to avoid taking the Sunday shift. Tonight, I'm sitting on the toilet bowl in agonizing pain with combination diarrhea and vomiting. My shift starts in 3 hours. FML

#20890943
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37586) - you deserved it (9937)

On 09/22/2013 at 12:26am - work - by not_fakingit - Canada (Quebec)

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

#20889450
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64730) - you deserved it (6257)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm - intimacy - by oops - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

#20889155
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47992) - you deserved it (3560)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17989) - you deserved it (88743)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML

#20883830
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47701) - you deserved it (7523)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:08pm - love - by Jake - United States (Oregon)

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45585) - you deserved it (8363)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

#20883308
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52337) - you deserved it (4794)

On 09/16/2013 at 12:35am - health - by chestycough - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54903) - you deserved it (27589)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was at Walmart with my stepmom. We were about to check out when a little sweet-looking old woman came up and asked if she could get in front of us. Seeing as she only had two items in her hands we said yes. Her husband then came up with two carts full of stuff, condoms on top. FML

Today, my fiancée called off our wedding, because she found out I had sex with another woman. Three years before we even met. FML

#20878703
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66163) - you deserved it (7159)

On 09/12/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by Crazy Crazy Crazy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56203) - you deserved it (9174)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML

#20874309
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55699) - you deserved it (23211)

On 09/09/2013 at 11:15am - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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