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tambo5135

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tambo5135

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 663
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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tambo5135's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancée broke up with me over text message while I was away for work. She later posted photos of her and her new boyfriend on Facebook, while still wearing my engagement ring. FML

#20972059
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51019) - you deserved it (2705)

On 11/27/2013 at 12:51am - love - by grantsidiots - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66861) - you deserved it (5561)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)

Today, I had to have a talk with my stalker. After telling him not to snapchat me, not to text me, and that I'm not interested, all he said was "I think persistence is going to be key here." FML

#20967638
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41781) - you deserved it (3326)

On 11/23/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by AshleyRose24 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my neighbor finally password-protected his wifi. Right in the middle of my timed, online exam. FML

#20965985
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27071) - you deserved it (85176)

On 11/21/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

#20965644
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55835) - you deserved it (12474)

On 11/21/2013 at 11:10am - misc - by smooth (man) - United States

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37222) - you deserved it (3245)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43267) - you deserved it (5252)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, for the tenth time, my teacher made a misbehaving student sit next to me as punishment. He begged for detention instead. FML

#20945365
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47436) - you deserved it (5218)

On 11/04/2013 at 5:01pm - misc - by WinkleBottom (man) - United States

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#20943386
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66663) - you deserved it (4618)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:21am - love - by StrandedWhale (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52801) - you deserved it (5237)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

#20941322
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41358) - you deserved it (3841)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86272) - you deserved it (6180)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27329) - you deserved it (40469)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan



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