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tambo5135

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tambo5135

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 830
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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tambo5135's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
416 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31685) - you deserved it (28385)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML

#12948197
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27175) - you deserved it (22852)

On 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17250) - you deserved it (41058)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML

Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML

#7816615
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47253) - you deserved it (36954)

On 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm - kids - by fuckmylife (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61703) - you deserved it (7066)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML

#7203649
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27391) - you deserved it (3601)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by James4929 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my wife had an affair with our marriage counselor. FML

#6480893
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56422) - you deserved it (2840)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:39pm - love - by Nobody (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my wife asked me if she looked cute in a new dress that she bought earlier today. I told her that she almost looks like a supermodel. Appearantly "almost" doesn't cut it. Guess who's sleeping on the couch. FML

#5785501
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32048) - you deserved it (11194)

On 10/11/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by keepmouthshut (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be hot to get it on in the gym storage room at school. Apparently so did my Chemistry and Drama teachers. FML

#5131831
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25007) - you deserved it (6493)

On 09/08/2009 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by TRAMATIZED (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML

#5086359
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10964) - you deserved it (41848)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, knowing that the girl I broke up with last night goes crazy after breakups, I threw away my hair products, thinking she switched them with Nair. She didn't... but she did use the key I keep under a flowerpot to take all of my clothes and burn them on my lawn while I was at work. FML

#5066785
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38594) - you deserved it (8047)

On 09/05/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71530) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML

#4673205
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9447) - you deserved it (91893)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

#4229570
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62855) - you deserved it (6852)

On 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by NoFriends - United States (New Hampshire)



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