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Offline (the 12/30/2014 at 2:40am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 May 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3170
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About talkomatic713 : Can't imagine anyone looking to FML for conversation...but if the feeling strikes you, send me a message.

talkomatic713's page activity

Visits<b>rodrigun449</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 9:59am<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 11:06am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 10:42pm<b>Steph_mmarie</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 1:09pm<b>BrandyFaye</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:21pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:18pm<b>ex_omer</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:28pm<b>MJDubbs</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:00pm<b>lisslyi</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 9:52pm<b>IceMan11</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 5:58pm<b>LilianaAlvarez</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:04am<b>Culito97</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 12:28am<b>LeslieKnorp</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:37pm<b>Patty410</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 9:28pm<b>AVGIII</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 7:38pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 11:11pm<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 12:25am

talkomatic713's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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talkomatic713's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML

by ldn / 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a club when a notoriously desperate and disgusting guy asked me to grind with him. Hoping for some backup, I coolly said, "You'll have to ask my boyfriend." My boyfriend's response? "Yeah, man, I don't care." FML

by really / 02/19/2013 at 10:27am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

by RosesAreRed / 02/15/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he found out my birthday is the same day as his, and he thinks we are twins who were separated at birth. FML

by okay then / 02/13/2013 at 5:09pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

by thefriedman / 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

by thoughtidseenitall / 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation

Today, thanks to our computer's browser history, I found out that my wife has been searching for local therapists who deal with cases of severe sex addiction. We've only had sex twice since we got married four months ago. FML

by papersofdivorce / 01/31/2013 at 12:08pm / Peru (Lima) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years decided to buy a $2500 taxidermied wolf on eBay. This is the same guy who refuses to get engaged because it would "cost too much right now." FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2013 at 2:23am / United States / Money

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

by andy / 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 10:14am / Canada (Quebec) / Love