talkomatic713

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Offline (the 12/30/2014 at 2:40am)

talkomatic713

0Fucked!

talkomatic713talkomatic713
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 May 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3027
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About talkomatic713 : Can't imagine anyone looking to FML for conversation...but if the feeling strikes you, send me a message.

talkomatic713's page activity

Visits<b>rodrigun449</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 9:59am<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 11:06am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 10:42pm<b>Steph_mmarie</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 1:09pm<b>BrandyFaye</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:21pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:18pm<b>ex_omer</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:28pm<b>MJDubbs</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:00pm<b>lisslyi</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 9:52pm<b>IceMan11</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 5:58pm<b>LilianaAlvarez</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:04am<b>Culito97</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 12:28am<b>LeslieKnorp</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:37pm<b>Patty410</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 9:28pm<b>AVGIII</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 7:38pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 11:11pm<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 12:25am

talkomatic713's FML badges

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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talkomatic713's favorite FMLs

Today, I was shopping for dresses when my fiancé turned into what I can only call a groomzilla. He told me and my maid of honor that we need to lose weight because he's not "paying all this money for a pair of fatties to not look good." FML

by Ms. Piggy / 03/02/2014 at 2:09pm / United States (Tennessee) / Money

Today, after getting a root canal, I told my mother how boring it was just sitting there with my mouth open for ages while the dentist did his work. She then told me how she had to do the same kind of thing on her anniversary night with my father. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2013 at 4:57pm / Argentina / Health

Today, I watched my boyfriend flirt with a cashier and write down his number for her, through the liquor store window, while I sat in the car waiting for him to finish buying things for our "romantic movie night." FML

by Opheliae / 07/29/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

by PrettyScared / 07/29/2013 at 11:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

by suckstosuck / 07/23/2013 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

by leeceetaylor99 / 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML

by bloody / 06/15/2013 at 4:57am / United States / Love

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

by Liferuinedforever / 05/14/2013 at 3:13am / Pakistan (Sindh) / Kids

Today, I learned my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I don't know if I'm more annoyed that he casually mentioned it after we've been together for 10 years, or that it actually works. FML

by MommaAnnie / 05/02/2013 at 11:59am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML

by Thanks Babe / 04/20/2013 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, my husband called me, saying he was in the hospital with a friend who'd just broken his arm. Too bad I then heard a female voice in the background mutter, "She'll never buy that". FML

by soontobesingle / 03/27/2013 at 3:55pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

by SwinginSolo / 03/26/2013 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy