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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 13475
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.

tacohead411's page activity

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tacohead411's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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tacohead411's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my lunch to work in the only box I had lying around my apartment - a small one from FedEx. When I went to the bathroom before lunch, I returned to my desk to find that one of my coworkers had mailed my lunch back to my apartment. FML

by fedexed / 07/27/2009 at 3:12pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

by bbbkingsey / 07/23/2009 at 3:10am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, while backpacking in Switzerland I had my camera stolen. Not only does this have photos of my entire trip but the pictures I took for my best friend's wedding. I was the only photographer of her elopement. FML

by pissedinSwiss / 07/17/2009 at 11:01am / Switzerland (Bern) / Holidays

Today, I got further with a guy than I've ever before. By that, I mean I got his phone number. FML

by stupiddddddd / 07/08/2009 at 3:28am / United Kingdom (Rotherham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made a bowl of spaghetti for my girlfriend and me. I tried the move from Lady and the Tramp where the boy and girl both slurp the same piece of spagetti and end up kissing. When I tried it, the spagetti went too down far my throat, and I ended up throwing it up on her. FML

by spitballer1 / 07/06/2009 at 12:54pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML

by dad / 06/29/2009 at 12:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, it's my birthday and I received a signed vintage Beatles' album from my wife. Awesome right? It's the same album some jerk way over-bidded me for on eBay. That jerk was my wife, using my credit card. FML

by xero_art / 06/26/2009 at 5:51am / United States (North Carolina) / Money

Today, my adorable five and a half year old boy told me that when he grows up he's going to be my boyfriend. I thought it was kinda cute until I asked him why. "Because you need one." FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML

by Person / 06/07/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

by Rhyno / 05/05/2009 at 11:37am / United States (New York) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I met my paternal grandfather for the first time. I’ve spent the last three months tracking him down. I poured my heart out and told about how much this meant to me. He told me I had a nice rack and asked for a cigarette. FML

by cgold / 04/29/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I turned 18. My parents gave me a card that read "now that you're 18, it's time for some boozy fun... you can do all the things you did before but legally!" Taped to the inside was my fake id that I "lost" three months ago. FML

by owned / 04/28/2009 at 10:12am / Singapore / Miscellaneous