Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sythe511

Offline (yesterday at 9:29pm) | Search for a member

sythe511

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 July 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1537
  • Number of comments : 123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About sythe511 : Hello! Yes, I took that picture myself at work. I love playing video games and working with electronics. I usually speak my mind, even if it means sparking controversy. Please don't be afraid to send me a message sometime!

sythe511's page activity

Visits<b>ZY1431</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 2:24pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 3:53pm<b>sorryheadphones</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:23pm<b>Clam_igger</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 3:11pm<b>ironik69</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:33am<b>wtfidkwtp</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 12:11am<b>lulinator</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 10:44pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:36am<b>Gmoney12</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:11am<b>TdotMaria</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:06pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:42pm<b>schmuckjon79</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 8:50pm<b>Le_Rabbid</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:04am<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 2:43pm<b>meli1195</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:52pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:15pm<b>sleepybb</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:44pm<b>gracieyates</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 4:12am

sythe511's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of sythe511's badges

sythe511's favorite FMLs

Today, due to my allergies I can't stop sneezing. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for my hemorrhoids making each sneeze feel like I'm getting a cactus shoved up my ass. FML

#20679212
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38223) - you deserved it (3451)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:38am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

#20661511
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54246) - you deserved it (3033)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML

#20657675
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57395) - you deserved it (6999)

On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States

Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML

#20642331
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42089) - you deserved it (73232)

On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51124) - you deserved it (4437)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML

#20637622
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53645) - you deserved it (3508)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm - love - by psycho ex (man) - Brazil

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

#20618481
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56798) - you deserved it (12731)

On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79598) - you deserved it (4089)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

#20605608
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54730) - you deserved it (6850)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm - kids - by reyoflight (man) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51424) - you deserved it (5953)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

#20602422
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43417) - you deserved it (5225)

On 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm - misc - by phonesmuggler (man) - United States

Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML

#20584991
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34396) - you deserved it (5710)

On 04/11/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by no tea parties here, gran (man) - United States

Today, I went to the bank to find out why they've taken $200 from me. By the time I show them my bank card, ID and tell them my problem, they accuse me of stealing my own identity, and refuse to give me my money back. FML

#20561553
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32561) - you deserved it (2094)

On 03/26/2013 at 9:37pm - money - by arsenicalhumor (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I realized that the smell of chlorine has started to turn me on, probably because my girlfriend has an indoor pool in her house. Guess who works as a swim instructor. FML

#20552149
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41067) - you deserved it (5739)

On 03/20/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my sink seemed to be filling up with dirty water. Concerned, I turned on the garbage disposal and plunged away. With no change in the water levels, I called a plumber. He reached in, pulled out the drain plug, and give me his bill while chuckling to himself. FML

#20551577
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10021) - you deserved it (40097)

On 03/19/2013 at 10:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: