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sykokitti

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sykokitti
  • Town/Country : Little Falls, NJ, Usa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 July 1982 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 349
  • Number of comments : 156
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About sykokitti : Whatever doesn't kill you, simply makes you stranger

sykokitti's last visitors

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sykokitti's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my future mother-in-law. All went well; she complimented my dress, and I complimented her haircut. Then she and her son had a screaming match over how our children will be fat because of their mother. FML

#21093159
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36740) - you deserved it (3083)

On 03/22/2014 at 12:49am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out what a lightweight my girlfriend is. After having a couple of drinks, she began flirting, then grabbed my ass. She felt around a bit before freaking out and asking where my penis was. FML

#21067583
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39884) - you deserved it (3901)

On 02/21/2014 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

#21066497
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42126) - you deserved it (4476)

On 02/20/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by begging for air - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36049) - you deserved it (7668)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43050) - you deserved it (3051)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I thought it was a good idea to flush the stink bug I found in my kitchen. Later I went in the bathroom to take a crap, and next thing I know, I feel a stink bug on my privates. I guess it didn't flush after all. FML

#21000427
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32605) - you deserved it (7076)

On 12/21/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

#20986172
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49233) - you deserved it (2945)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend brought a 12-pack of beer to my mother's wake. FML

#20958939
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34846) - you deserved it (3934)

On 11/15/2013 at 5:51pm - misc - by haqL (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25762) - you deserved it (37122)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML

#20925128
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63449) - you deserved it (2634)

On 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my new husband and I were called up to have our first dance at our wedding. While I rested my head on his shoulder, he whispered the most romantic thing to me: "Your breath stinks." FML

#20830424
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43062) - you deserved it (9631)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:48am - love - by fml (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57182) - you deserved it (3613)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing hysterically. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

#20808604
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53016) - you deserved it (7002)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41976) - you deserved it (13980)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38626) - you deserved it (2757)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)



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