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sxm

Offline (the 12/12/2014 at 9:01pm) | Search for a member

sxm

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1666
  • Number of comments : 121
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About sxm : about me?? whats there to say that im addicted to this app on my iphone, everytime i wake up i read these flm's ppl put up... so ya a little about me....

sxm's page activity

Visits<b>ethan_unoxx</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:16pm<b>Tankkiller308</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 10:06pm<b>munuxi</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 3:45am<b>Jarl_the_Elite</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 1:47am<b>macorncob</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 3:42pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:46pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 6:48pm<b>db32</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:01am<b>omnia</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 4:30pm<b>Epickitty58</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 11:21am<b>Raidriar</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 12:51pm<b>Sassie8810</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 9:46pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 12:03pm<b>aruden</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 6:31am<b>Megwan05</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 6:05am<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 7:13pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 6:43pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 6:47pm

sxm's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of sxm's badges

sxm's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57222) - you deserved it (6782)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59582) - you deserved it (21013)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49972) - you deserved it (3987)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was walking down the street when someone pushed me into poison ivy. He ran off saying, "That's for beating me in the race." I've never been in a race, nor have I ever met him. FML

#20770379
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45509) - you deserved it (3167)

On 07/08/2013 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55070) - you deserved it (7754)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53937) - you deserved it (3461)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to a flooded basement. That basement is my bedroom, so I'm completely surrounded by water. All I need is a tiger and this would be like The Life of Pi. FML

#20752548
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45985) - you deserved it (3484)

On 06/28/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML

#20752113
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57332) - you deserved it (3881)

On 06/28/2013 at 8:23am - love - by confusedandnowsingle (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML

#20733830
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56185) - you deserved it (5314)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:48pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML

#20732528
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36802) - you deserved it (5419)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by ProAwkward - United States (Texas)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61037) - you deserved it (13825)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I had to make a poster for social studies. I decided to write "Nice ass" in hieroglyphics. Turns out my teacher can read hieroglyphics. FML

#20691781
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23020) - you deserved it (47681)

On 05/28/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by Amber - United States (California)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77375) - you deserved it (5292)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML

#20654425
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58474) - you deserved it (5977)

On 05/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89915) - you deserved it (5643)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)



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