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sweetheart5292

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sweetheart5292

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 February 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10535
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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sweetheart5292's page activity

Visits<b>support_zombies</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:36pm<b>Decky_Bar</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 1:37pm<b>whatsittoyabitch</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 9:18pm<b>thechoob</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 8:12pm<b>tylerh912</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 6:26pm<b>Chraatsiah</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:50am<b>zihan789</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 12:14am<b>Blackhawk706</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 12:56am<b>pomnef</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:01am<b>cmat84</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 7:35pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 5:57pm<b>hurricanesTheU</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 8:35pm<b>MadProphet</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 8:41am<b>colton_colton</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 6:47pm<b>pancakessdsjsn</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 5:08am<b>LilMsDulce</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:27am<b>littlemantn</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 12:00am<b>trevorh690</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 9:47pm

sweetheart5292's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sweetheart5292's favorite FMLs

Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML

#2009898
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56879) - you deserved it (21387)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28454) - you deserved it (85182)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a bike ride when a bug flew into my eye. Not wanting to stop, I figured I would just keep that eye closed until I could cry it out. Five seconds later, a bug flew into my other eye. FML

#2003683
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50941) - you deserved it (7865)

On 05/17/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying "I'm good" or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML

#1972272
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58948) - you deserved it (23422)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting next to this really cute guy in choir class. Trying to make conversation, I asked him what his favorite song was. He replied "Leave Me Alone". I asked him who it was by and he said, "It's not a song, I just want you to leave me alone". FML

#1963959
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28170) - you deserved it (8124)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by jayden5 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

#1869904
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11726) - you deserved it (78251)

On 05/12/2009 at 10:23am - misc - by Permafucked (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML

#1834550
641 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91825) - you deserved it (8372)

On 05/11/2009 at 1:12am - intimacy - by Hallllo (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

#1793303
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30243) - you deserved it (47801)

On 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm - work - by Failoffel (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

#1791192
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23407) - you deserved it (79181)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up happier than I've ever been because last night I hooked up with the girl I have loved for almost a year and I thought I would never get with her. This morning I saw that her status on Facebook was "FML". FML

#1782670
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75216) - you deserved it (6500)

On 05/09/2009 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried for the first time putting a condom on my boyfriend using my mouth. I freaked out, swallowed, and started choking on the condom. FML

#1775896
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30380) - you deserved it (77501)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

#1775796
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17389) - you deserved it (70655)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:48am - love - by rawkdinosawr (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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