Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sweet2u22

Search for a member

sweet2u22

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 October 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1315
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

sweet2u22's page activity

Visits<b>klune</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:09am<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 5:02am<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 1:04am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 9:06pm<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 12:49pm<b>thedon6191</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:37pm<b>priest_of_war</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 4:31pm<b>Slicknik23</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 9:39pm<b>abutton</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 10:08am<b>g9m9brown</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 2:26am<b>hiitsmeeeeeee</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 1:11am<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 6:28pm<b>chrisiffer</b> - the 01/04/2012 at 5:21pm<b>ThecomingofTan</b> - the 01/04/2012 at 4:42pm<b>SnowWitney</b> - the 12/15/2011 at 7:07pm<b>ChucklesTheClown</b> - the 10/24/2011 at 12:15pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 10/06/2011 at 2:54am

sweet2u22's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of sweet2u22's badges

sweet2u22's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML

#15874125
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23947) - you deserved it (51493)

On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

#15793137
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17531) - you deserved it (27870)

On 04/15/2011 at 7:47am - animals - by spiderwoman (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19273) - you deserved it (65864)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML

#15705121
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17886) - you deserved it (30213)

On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I decided to go down on my girlfriend. In the midst of her orgasm, she grabbed my head with her legs, performing a submission most UFC fighters could be proud of, and she held on for so long that I was suffocated. FML

#15555726
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39040) - you deserved it (9502)

On 03/30/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by kingpin7 - United States

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
483 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55170) - you deserved it (27680)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27962) - you deserved it (54287) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I would be ecstatic if he hadn't stuck the ring on his balls and asked for a blow-job. He even confessed that the original plan was to stick it on his penis but it was too small. FML

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51636) - you deserved it (3988)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him 'meow' over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

#15442777
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22070) - you deserved it (62613)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by Fcuked (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

#15441546
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11013) - you deserved it (41534)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by PFCdavila (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47031) - you deserved it (4449)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was driving home at night, and got into an accident. Someone had left a toilet in the middle of the road. I hit it. The toilet's fine, but my car now has a toilet-shaped dent in the front. FML

#15431465
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32138) - you deserved it (5889)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by jballer - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

#15430260
699 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70582) - you deserved it (15316)

On 03/22/2011 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

#15426482
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47750) - you deserved it (27082)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: