This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, at some point, and for some reason I'll probably never fully understand, it seemed like a good idea to get completely shitfaced on tequila and try to shave my ballsack with a straight razor. I'm not sure if these wounds will ever heal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9512) - you deserved it (49776)
On 08/01/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my wife threw a piece of tofu cake at my head for suggesting that the money she'd spent on magic "healing" crystals and homeopathic "remedies" would've just as well been spent on a chocolate teapot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (4826)
On 07/29/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by notabeliever - United States (California)
Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26058) - you deserved it (4775)
On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21311) - you deserved it (7267)
On 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm - kids - by corasmom (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22306) - you deserved it (8605)
On 07/25/2011 at 2:07pm - misc - by youjustsuck (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9851) - you deserved it (41657)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)
Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25503) - you deserved it (2256)
On 07/25/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Bec (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27236) - you deserved it (6347)
On 07/25/2011 at 3:21am - health - by jgdgjyfg - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53029) - you deserved it (5466)
On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States
Today, I was arrested. The policeman threw me to the ground because I wouldn't answer his questions. This was after he told me I had the "right to remain silent". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (6685)
On 07/23/2011 at 6:29am - misc - by tgd4444 (man) - Malaysia (Johor)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend poops with "This is war" playing on his phone, and makes war sounds corresponding with his poop dropping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23319) - you deserved it (3155)
On 07/23/2011 at 3:49am - love - by MaHalKiTa (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my family is on the third day of driving cross country. My husband is still pretending he is driving on a NASCAR track, sound effects and all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18407) - you deserved it (2950)
On 07/20/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by Stacy Dee - United States
Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28130) - you deserved it (6460)
On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7372) - you deserved it (49783)
On 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm - misc - by freakfreak12345 - United States (Maine)
Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21938) - you deserved it (4560)
On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
