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super3286

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super3286
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1696
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

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super3286's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my teacher look over my essay before turning it in. He said it was extremely well-written, so I handed it in. When I got it back, the feedback he left said it was one of the worst essays he'd ever read. FML

#21115571
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19064) - you deserved it (1404)

On 04/17/2014 at 3:59pm - work - by badessaymyass (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML

#20101222
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22291) - you deserved it (2368)

On 10/04/2012 at 10:44am - love - by Dave (man) - United States

Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML

#20084083
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14236) - you deserved it (6164)

On 09/22/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML

Today, my boss gave me a warning for "insulting our best customer" after she saw a comment on her customer card saying "stop giving this fat bitch free samples." My boss had written it in the first place, but refuses to either remember or admit it. FML

#19969861
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17824) - you deserved it (1237)

On 07/21/2012 at 6:49pm - work - by fuckdubstep51 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend got a job was so that he could buy weed. FML

#19898504
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17835) - you deserved it (5853)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:46am - misc - by hopeless (woman) - United States

Today, it's my twenty first birthday. My biggest birthday surprise was discovering that I'm alcohol intolerant, by vomiting my first beer all over my boyfriend's mother. FML

#19359815
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21393) - you deserved it (3954)

On 03/27/2012 at 9:08pm - health - by Anna - United States

Today, my mom was more upset about my 67 on an Algebra test than my sister almost setting the house on fire. FML

#18788903
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22039) - you deserved it (5215)

On 01/12/2012 at 8:20pm - misc - by xXMudkipNoobXx - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38524) - you deserved it (5133)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I discovered the piggy bank I made a Facebook account for has more friends than me. It has 12. FML

#13733621
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (12317)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after my marching band's performance, the girls had to change out of our uniforms in a very dark school bathroom. Someone turned on the lights and I realized that more than a dozen roaches had crawled into my skinny jeans. FML

#13389421
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28244) - you deserved it (2726)

On 10/10/2010 at 4:45am - misc - by toazt - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got out our electric fan because it was very hot. A cockroach crawled up behind the frame on the fan and fell into the gap of the frame. It got itself killed by the rotating fan, and had its blended flesh sent flying all over my white polo shirt. FML

#13015413
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (3389)

On 09/12/2010 at 4:00am - misc - by roachblend (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, my aunt asked me to babysit my cousin. She gave me a warning that he says he's allergic to foods to get out of eating them. When I brought out my homemade cooking, he told me he was allergic, so I made him eat it anyway. Turns out he WAS allergic. FML

#12582997
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31976) - you deserved it (10938)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to apply medicine to my friend's spider bites, located on her ass crack. FML

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML

#10667407
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40068) - you deserved it (10420)

On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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