About sumbum95 : What's up, buttercup? :)
Socialite
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I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my boyfriend told me I was almost perfect. And the only reason I'm not completely perfect is because I don't like Mountain Dew. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12921) - you deserved it (17649)
On 06/24/2012 at 1:01am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16159) - you deserved it (4967)
On 06/23/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24005) - you deserved it (2274)
On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18895) - you deserved it (1069)
On 06/23/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Coffee Boy - United States (Missouri)
Today, I divorced my husband of 20 years. The only positive thing about my day was my pregnancy test. Yes, it was his. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20063) - you deserved it (5946)
On 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by GM38 - United States (Florida)
Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10445) - you deserved it (22960)
On 06/22/2012 at 9:08am - misc - by ExplosiveDildo (woman) - Afghanistan
Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18560) - you deserved it (2749)
On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)
Today, while watching TV with my boyfriend, I was telling him that I wasn't looking forward to "getting older" and turning thirty in three days. Five minutes later, he said, "I never knew you had so much grey hair already" and then offered to help me dye them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12543) - you deserved it (2562)
On 06/22/2012 at 2:02am - misc - by Username (woman) - United States
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for dinner. The first words out of my dad's mouth were apparently, "Ah, you must be Dan's slam-piece." I was in the living room and didn't quite catch it all, but I said, "She certainly is!" Now I'm single, and all my friends think I'm a bastard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16077) - you deserved it (6942)
On 06/21/2012 at 2:19pm - love - by igiveup (man) - United States
Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17033) - you deserved it (860)
On 06/21/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (6167)
On 06/21/2012 at 1:40am - kids - by Bad Mommy - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend thought he could make a pregnancy test read positive by jizzing on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20213) - you deserved it (3065)
On 06/21/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by really (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was lecturing my high school students on the importance of a good education. I pointed out the janitor in the hall and told them if they didn't stay in school, they'd end up like him. Then one of my students raised her hand and reminded me that the janitor I pointed to was her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4635) - you deserved it (48960)
On 06/21/2012 at 12:11am - work - by daddy'sgirl - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16306) - you deserved it (1978)
On 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, after careful consideration, I told my wife I really want to have kids. She laughed, until she finally realized I was serious, at which point she flicked me in the balls and said, "Problem solved." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18696) - you deserved it (2209)
On 06/20/2012 at 12:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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