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sumbum95

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sumbum95

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4769
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About sumbum95 : What's up, buttercup? :)

I love meeting new people so shoot me a message! :D

sumbum95's page activity

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Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 11:17pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 9:27am

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sumbum95's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to forcibly separate a boy from my daughter after he grabbed her and started shoving her around. I complained to his mother, only to have her shout, "mind your fucking business" and say that her son can do whatever the hell he wants. FML

#20168309
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28205) - you deserved it (1584)

On 11/18/2012 at 4:22pm - kids - by WELL FUCK YOU KINDLY, MA'AM (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after I spent two hours trying to teach my girlfriend to play sudoku, she broke up with me, tearfully claiming that I'd made up a fake, imaginary game to make her feel stupid. FML

#20167793
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31135) - you deserved it (3185)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was grocery shopping. When I turned around I noticed a group of teens passing by laughing. I didn't think anything of it until I got to my cart. The losers had left a pack of Slim Fast in my cart. I'm pregnant. FML

#20167758
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27896) - you deserved it (1950)

On 11/18/2012 at 6:00am - health - by depressedpreggo (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

#20166401
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (5334)

On 11/17/2012 at 8:34am - love - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I asked my manager if wearing makeup was a requirement for the job. She told me, "Not if you're naturally pretty... So for you, yes". FML

#20166313
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25207) - you deserved it (3038)

On 11/17/2012 at 4:15am - work - by satega - United States (Missouri)

Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML

#20165827
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31197) - you deserved it (1771)

On 11/16/2012 at 7:30pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Croatia (Primorsko-Goranska)

Today, I went to a big job interview. Everything went well at first, with the interviewer being impressed by my CV. I was then interrogated over not having a Facebook account, and practically accused of being a criminal, because people without them "always have something to hide". FML

#20165792
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22471) - you deserved it (1558)

On 11/16/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34333) - you deserved it (3499)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML

#20164798
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27898) - you deserved it (2311)

On 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm - love - by Sexting Parents - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

#20164653
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22663) - you deserved it (1486)

On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

#20164153
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9215) - you deserved it (42918)

On 11/15/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad put an onion in my room, telling me spirits won't haunt me and that I won't get sick. He thinks a vegetable will protect me. FML

#20163512
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17802) - you deserved it (2313)

On 11/14/2012 at 7:48pm - health - by duhasiangirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, knowing that I have been in a lot of stress lately, my friend tried to teach me how to meditate. Eventually, I ended up in a deeply relaxed state in which my mind was completely clear. When I snapped out of it, I realized I'd peed myself. FML

#20163308
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20572) - you deserved it (2995)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:55pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47386) - you deserved it (6017)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

#20163115
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (3368)

On 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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