sumbum95

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Offline (the 04/22/2015 at 10:19pm)

sumbum95

10Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12235
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About sumbum95 : What's up, buttercup? :)

I love meeting new people so shoot me a message! :D

sumbum95's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 2:05am<b>billboob</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 4:37pm<b>hazardous17</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 1:43pm<b>dno79</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 11:11am<b>FlamingColor</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 11:08pm<b>tatteredshirt</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 1:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 2:52pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 9:57pm<b>Zatalmas</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 12:22pm<b>jowshow</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 11:18pm<b>Lonelychick1249</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 1:45pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 8:51pm<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 1:32pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 5:35pm<b>grigri75</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 8:46pm<b>Mean_Oreo2436</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 3:08am<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:46am<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 6:19pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:52pm<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:46pm<b>142asdfqq</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:41pm<b>Mendez07</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 7:18am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:21am<b>MrPancak3</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:39am<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:48am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:57am<b>blazerman</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 9:27am

sumbum95's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of sumbum95's badges

sumbum95's favorite FMLs

Today, after I spent two hours trying to teach my girlfriend to play sudoku, she broke up with me, tearfully claiming that I'd made up a fake, imaginary game to make her feel stupid. FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2012 at 7:13am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was grocery shopping. When I turned around I noticed a group of teens passing by laughing. I didn't think anything of it until I got to my cart. The losers had left a pack of Slim Fast in my cart. I'm pregnant. FML

by depressedpreggo / 11/18/2012 at 6:00am / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

by schooyou101 / 11/17/2012 at 8:34am / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I asked my manager if wearing makeup was a requirement for the job. She told me, "Not if you're naturally pretty... So for you, yes". FML

by satega / 11/17/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2012 at 7:30pm / Croatia (Primorsko-Goranska) / Health

Today, I went to a big job interview. Everything went well at first, with the interviewer being impressed by my CV. I was then interrogated over not having a Facebook account, and practically accused of being a criminal, because people without them "always have something to hide". FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2012 at 6:59pm / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Work

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

by thanks, fuckface / 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML

by Sexting Parents / 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 9:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad put an onion in my room, telling me spirits won't haunt me and that I won't get sick. He thinks a vegetable will protect me. FML

by duhasiangirl / 11/14/2012 at 7:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, knowing that I have been in a lot of stress lately, my friend tried to teach me how to meditate. Eventually, I ended up in a deeply relaxed state in which my mind was completely clear. When I snapped out of it, I realized I'd peed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:55pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous