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sumbum95

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sumbum95

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3861
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About sumbum95 : What's up, buttercup? :)

I love meeting new people so shoot me a message! :D

sumbum95's page activity

Visits<b>blazerman</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:22pm<b>NotAgainShit</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:31pm<b>bigmanE</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:32pm<b>anthony89</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:59pm<b>GrungeGeek17</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Ian_from_0070</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 9:47am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 12:47pm<b>tinytitan98</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 9:52pm<b>weraru</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 12:50pm<b>XxCatalyst</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:14pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:52pm<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:59pm<b>Cristhian8</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:54pm<b>Arni792</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 3:32am<b>bigwiensch</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 11:42pm<b>daletris123</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 7:24pm<b>nancydope</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 4:07am<b>rockytop33</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 6:37pm

Liked!<b>blazerman</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 9:27am

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sumbum95's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML

#20186465
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41916) - you deserved it (6606)

On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30977) - you deserved it (8797)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML

#20182587
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6054) - you deserved it (41824)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)

Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29470) - you deserved it (3386)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML

#20177960
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8456) - you deserved it (32413)

On 11/25/2012 at 10:08am - health - by I'm stupid - United States (Illinois)

Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML

#20177780
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25412) - you deserved it (1814)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

#20177257
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24983) - you deserved it (1752)

On 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at work, I took an order from a stuck-up sounding lady over the phone. She said her last name was "duckling, but with an F". Bemused, I wrote her name on the order. When she arrived to pick it up later, she told me she'd said "s", not "f". FML

#20177082
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17520) - you deserved it (2547)

On 11/24/2012 at 7:25pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, my girlfriend came over to a family game night. Halfway through a game of Klingon Monopoly, my drunk parents started arguing because apparently, while my dad was in jail, he cheated on my mom with a Klingon whore. I doubt my girlfriend will ever visit again. FML

#20176987
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21408) - you deserved it (2239)

On 11/24/2012 at 6:11pm - love - by Eganstein (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

#20176354
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34258) - you deserved it (10907)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25219) - you deserved it (1769)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, I took a picture of myself wearing a whipped cream bra with cherry nipples, captioned, "I hope you enjoyed your dinner, now how about some dessert???" I meant to send it to my fiancé. I sent it by mistake to my dad. FML

#20176010
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18085) - you deserved it (43729)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Whipped Cream - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went out and bought a copy of Black Ops 2. I got home and opened the case, only to see the game disk was missing. When I went back to the store to complain, the guy at the desk accused me of trying to pull an old scam on him. FML

#20175155
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23362) - you deserved it (2304)

On 11/23/2012 at 12:20pm - money - by FUCK A FUCKING DUCK (man) - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19933) - you deserved it (3581)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML

#20172916
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11222) - you deserved it (27267)

On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada



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