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You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I had my end of year physics exam. I wasn't sure about some stuff, so I hid my notes and textbook in the bathroom. Halfway through, I got up, went to the bathroom, and as soon as I picked up the book, forgot what I was looking for. I can't even cheat right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4621) - you deserved it (34657)
On 07/02/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28896) - you deserved it (1137)
Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4736) - you deserved it (13159)
Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41985) - you deserved it (1590)
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29516) - you deserved it (2878)
Today, I was at the mall with my friend. A lady came up to us and told my friend that she could be a model. Then the lady looked at me and said, "Oh... Nice shoes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18214) - you deserved it (1512)
On 06/15/2012 at 1:54am - misc - by Rose (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7633) - you deserved it (28345)
On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17531) - you deserved it (3450)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31307) - you deserved it (2939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23522) - you deserved it (2509)
On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet. A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6121) - you deserved it (6555)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17056) - you deserved it (4367)
Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8330) - you deserved it (26574)
On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (2416)
On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20728) - you deserved it (7959)
On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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