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suffokateslowly

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suffokateslowly

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 January 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 651
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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suffokateslowly's page activity

Visits<b>GingerM101</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 6:55pm<b>alex602</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 12:27am<b>hotbutthurttoast</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 11:29pm<b>McFuzzyMan</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 5:41pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 8:14pm<b>malheartsnutmeg</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 10:13pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 12:30pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:52pm<b>iBou</b> - the 03/11/2011 at 11:25am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 11/15/2010 at 9:12am<b>PhantomJen</b> - the 08/24/2010 at 4:21am<b>Livexx4xxLove</b> - the 04/19/2010 at 12:31am

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suffokateslowly's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum thought it would be acceptable to tell my school that the reason I will not be attending classes is because I have "the shits." FML

#12960697
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27494) - you deserved it (2795)

On 09/08/2010 at 7:24am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML

#7268268
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (4044)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML

#7268268
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (4044)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

#6528264
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26422) - you deserved it (12486)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I called my Dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell was. She then informed me that our Dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML

#3332242
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (2856)

On 06/29/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by shroomda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I called my Dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell was. She then informed me that our Dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML

#3332242
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (2856)

On 06/29/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by shroomda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83946) - you deserved it (20416)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30020) - you deserved it (74741)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30020) - you deserved it (74741)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, while arriving at my best friend's wedding, I accidentally ran over her 2 dogs. FML

#2433672
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50881) - you deserved it (22497)

On 05/30/2009 at 2:04pm - animals - by lfssecond - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped grabbed the ball for the kid and started to hand it to him. He then yelled "Stranger Danger" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30mins. FML

#1864532
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56708) - you deserved it (2778)

On 05/12/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by TheJoker (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I called a potential employer. I left a message asking him to return my call. When he did, my drunk friend answered my phone with "I make a sexy-time with my mother in-law." I called him back twice immediately to explain. No answer. That was my last hope for a decent job. FML

#226601
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43911) - you deserved it (7967)

On 03/06/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by sasd32 (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was at church and saw a blind teenager who obviously felt lost. Feeling like I should help I went over and asked if he needed anything. He said, "I can't find my caretaker." I asked, "What does she look like?" FML

#159157
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15106) - you deserved it (59563)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by wideman (man) - United States (California)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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