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Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57914) - you deserved it (10142)
On 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm - love - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35894) - you deserved it (2403)
On 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm - health - by Braxam - United States
Today, I spent fifteen minutes looking for my phone in my car before I realized I was using it as a flashlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11984) - you deserved it (42484)
On 06/09/2011 at 2:30pm - misc - by Username - United States
Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28376) - you deserved it (18312)
On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38228) - you deserved it (11258)
On 10/07/2010 at 2:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10076) - you deserved it (42302)
On 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by R (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16742) - you deserved it (36934)
On 07/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by slightlyslow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20813) - you deserved it (357576)
On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 17 June 2013
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