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stillalive33

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

stillalive33

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 321
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About stillalive33 : I swim, play tennis, and march. F Horn and mellophone. 2x state champion

stillalive33's page activity

Visits<b>katejanek</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 9:44pm<b>btwmellarkc</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:39pm<b>FutureMatty</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 7:16am<b>mip_92</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Eternity49</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:02pm<b>shaar</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 11:51pm<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:06pm<b>Vaneessaa</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 6:12pm<b>omnia</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 8:02am<b>mt631</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:08pm<b>deathpotato</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 12:11pm<b>osnapitsalexx</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:12am<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 1:44am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 12:24am<b>rutalking2me</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:34pm<b>dpook</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:03pm<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:01pm<b>xLunarius</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:00pm

stillalive33's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of stillalive33's badges

stillalive33's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a round of applause. Too bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31997) - you deserved it (3544)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46298) - you deserved it (14238)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51457) - you deserved it (6609)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

#21183341
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42536) - you deserved it (4399)

On 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by LoveGlove (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49101) - you deserved it (13680)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my boyfriend once again cancelled a date because he has too much homework. His professor is my dad, who's assigning astronomical amounts of homework to keep us from seeing each other. FML

#21180214
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56002) - you deserved it (4426)

On 06/19/2014 at 1:28am - love - by professorsdaughter - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

#21111270
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43203) - you deserved it (6489)

On 04/12/2014 at 5:01pm - animals - by princess (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

#21107421
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42795) - you deserved it (6249)

On 04/08/2014 at 3:56am - misc - by the long distance guy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

#21104415
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32523) - you deserved it (17980)

On 04/04/2014 at 1:26pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, my gran came over for dinner, for which I had to go grab some supplies from the supermarket. I guess I should have locked my laptop, because when I came back, I found my gran had used my Facebook account to propose to my now-ecstatic girlfriend. FML

#20897003
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42569) - you deserved it (5778)

On 09/26/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by my gran is a cuntwaffle (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

#20860751
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38838) - you deserved it (6296)

On 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by no life to fuck :/ (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

#20585229
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57025) - you deserved it (16038)

On 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML

#20561241
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27346) - you deserved it (3092)

On 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm - animals - by whykarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my hubby and I decided to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town, so we drove to one that was 30 mins away. We decided on our items, and went to the check out. Who would have guessed my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML

#20146867
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30672) - you deserved it (4732)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:55am - intimacy - by screwed - United States



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