About stevieexxoo : I'm 14, blonde, and 5 feet 2 inches ( :
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16152) - you deserved it (2286)
On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15174) - you deserved it (25956)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53535) - you deserved it (5831)
On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States
Today, I woke up after drunkenly hooking up with a girl who was really into Twilight. I felt bruises on the lower end of my neck and so I went to the mirror and checked it out. She bit me, 5 times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9875) - you deserved it (25499)
On 11/21/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by jibberish (man) - United States (California)
Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61157) - you deserved it (3343)
On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42691) - you deserved it (9766)
On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (98067) - you deserved it (4140)
On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46042) - you deserved it (2040)
On 08/11/2009 at 10:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27679) - you deserved it (43356)
On 05/28/2009 at 1:15pm - health - by ITguy1982 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I forgot my inhaler. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the ER. The doctors told me it wasn't an asthma attack. It was just a panic attack from worrying about whether I would get an asthma attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51313) - you deserved it (13045)
On 05/01/2009 at 5:07pm - health - by jlover42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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