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Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18655) - you totally deserved it (3502)
On 10/24/2009 at 6:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18778) - you totally deserved it (3886)
On 10/21/2009 at 10:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3363) - you totally deserved it (29965)
On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7011) - you totally deserved it (18838)
On 10/20/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by FailedEngineer (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my research partner emails me 2 hours before our deadline saying that she can't complete her half of our 20 page report because when she woke up this morning she couldn't see. How did she write the email? FML
I agree, your life sucks (26416) - you totally deserved it (992)
On 10/18/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by NUsConstantine (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25184) - you totally deserved it (777)
On 10/18/2009 at 12:06am - work - by booste (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I stopped at the light when someone crashed on to my motorcycle making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I forgot to lift the helmet shield. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5345) - you totally deserved it (27715)
On 10/08/2009 at 8:22am - misc - by lumacsp - United States (Florida)
Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23294) - you totally deserved it (2350)
On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34822) - you totally deserved it (2766)
On 10/03/2009 at 7:43am - love - by Anon (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3905) - you totally deserved it (38477)
On 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend who had just been awakened by her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35186) - you totally deserved it (2093)
On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)
Today, I went to eat with my girlfriend, her parents and my mother. My mother complained about every aspect of the service. When I told her she needed to assert herself, she took her pocketbook and hit me over the head. The whole restaurant stared at us while she yelled "Is that assertive enough?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20206) - you totally deserved it (3678)
On 09/29/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by User06606 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4367) - you totally deserved it (27409)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by desperate (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, the gas station right in front of my apartment had people listening to loud music all night. I have this 3 hour test at 7:30am and didn't get any sleep. Worst of all, here in Brazil, calling the police won't help a thing. Instead of actually helping, they'll stop and join the party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24887) - you totally deserved it (1461)
On 09/25/2009 at 4:33am - misc - by stupidpolicia (woman) - Brazil (Distrito Federal)
Today, I went to my Russian language class after days of being sick. We must speak in Russian. The professor asked how I felt. I said "like shit." I didn't know the word I used was the verb, not the noun. So I told an awesome prof and class I was "feeling like I was in the process of defacating." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6311) - you totally deserved it (16511)
On 09/25/2009 at 2:18am - misc - by rebel_rose (woman) - United States (Iowa)
