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starman02

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starman02
  • Town/Country : Edmonton, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 July 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 1371
  • Number of comments : 154
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About starman02 : Alright first of all I invented water.. You've probably drank it, or swam in it before yeah that stuff.. Your welcome
I'm a retired astronaut
I've competed in the UFC professionally I'm undefeated inside the octagon
I can fly, no you can't see
I'm married to batman
Your family wanted to adopt me when we were kids
I can answer the mysteries of the universe
I get presents on your birthday from your friends, if they are mutual friends I get your presents
I punched a shark in the face and made it cry
When I was a kid I single handedly built a time machine and stopped hitler from winning WWII yeah.. Your welcome world
I look directly into the sun absorb the sunlight and than use it to see in the dark later
I'm fireproof
The devil sold his soul to me, I gave it to Justin bieber
I smell great
I am awesome

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starman02's favorite FMLs

Today, I was volunteering at a school, as I walked past the swings these two girls smiled and said "wow, you are so pretty!". I smiled back and said "awww, well thank you!." As I walked past I hear them laughing, "she actually believed us." FML

#737315
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51378) - you deserved it (4397)

On 03/31/2009 at 11:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

#527563
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (160928) - you deserved it (27701)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML

#511174
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (115436) - you deserved it (18200)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
859 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49390) - you deserved it (598088)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

#415809
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92124) - you deserved it (42632)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm - intimacy - by MrAwsum (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

#391986
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (164066) - you deserved it (32118)

On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197301) - you deserved it (31302)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1094787) - you deserved it (108803)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1094787) - you deserved it (108803)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

#97632
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (239398) - you deserved it (43353)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by GD (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



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