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starla_xoxo

Offline (the 11/13/2015 at 8:44pm) | Search for a member

starla_xoxo

0Fucked!

starla_xoxo
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3461
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About starla_xoxo : I love riding horses, being outside and being with my amazing boyfriend. (:

starla_xoxo's page activity

Visits<b>Shay_Shay97</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 1:41am<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 6:46pm<b>Livin_Like_Larry</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 10:06am<b>omgpp</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 8:21am<b>tinywingzzz</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 9:20am<b>OochenSnoochen</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:40pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:01pm<b>gingaa96</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:26am<b>DJisHere11</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:56am<b>blueman_17</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:26am<b>Vanshikap</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 7:11am<b>Demig0d6</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 3:53am<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:07pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Beansforbill</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:02pm<b>Kyklopes</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 10:37am<b>ShakeDisPlace</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 10:34am<b>dre82</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 5:46pm

starla_xoxo's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of starla_xoxo's badges

starla_xoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend, who is rather large, picked me up to give me a hug, and some over-eager security guard actually pointed his tazer at him and told him to put me down. So he put me down and tried to ask what he'd done wrong. The bastard tazed him for acting aggressively. FML

#21490908
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28779) - you deserved it (1631)

On 11/10/2015 at 5:15pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Czech Republic

Today, I realised how damn creepy I am because I get nervous and smile when someone looks at me, and no it's not one of those smiles you'd love looking at, it's a smile straight out of a horror movie. I made a bunch of children run away. FML

#21489520
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21105) - you deserved it (2528)

On 11/07/2015 at 9:33am - misc - by Hipnog (man) - Czech Republic

Today, I got married. The minister pronounced us husband and wife using our first names. Except he used my husband's ex-wife's name. I happened to glance at my mother-in-law who was almost in tears from laughing so hard. FML

Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML

#21488242
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (2217)

On 11/04/2015 at 1:02am - animals - by downgirl - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I drove in heavy rain for the first time, by myself. I had been told to drive below the speed limit, and be extra careful of the cars around me. Nobody had told me about thunder scaring a cow that would then escape from the corral and hit my car. FML

#21488178
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24954) - you deserved it (1642)

On 11/03/2015 at 10:24pm - animals - by damaged - United States (California)

Today, I learned the hard way that my boyfriend lied about getting a vasectomy before we met, in spite of knowing how phobic I am of pregnancy and kids. His defense? "I figured you'd change your mind someday, because all you chicks love babies." FML

Today, my dad got dressed up in formal clothes, and I asked what the occasion was. He said he had a hot date, which would've been fine if he hadn't told me what was "on the menu", namely "wining, dining, sixty-nining". Thanks for that image. FML

#21487839
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20211) - you deserved it (2040)

On 11/03/2015 at 10:43am - misc - by ew (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend had the choice of A) living alone gaming, or B) moving in with me, gaming in his own man-cave, lots of sex, and lots of pizza. He chose choice A. FML

#21487379
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28863) - you deserved it (4845)

On 11/02/2015 at 2:25pm - love - by Anonymous - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I asked a guy out. He told me no. Well, his exact words were "I would never go out with a whale, sorry." Then he went on to make whale noises. FML

#21487370
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30987) - you deserved it (3911)

On 11/02/2015 at 2:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was upstairs with my wife when I heard my cat scream from the porch downstairs. I ran down to find her "puffed up" and growling on the floor, and a corner of the screen next to the door busted out. I still have no idea what caused it and my wife is now afraid to go to sleep. FML

#21487156
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22356) - you deserved it (1567)

On 11/01/2015 at 11:22pm - animals - by time to buy a gun - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML

#21487113
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25560) - you deserved it (6791)

On 11/01/2015 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of trick or treaters. It was actually a naked man. He wanted to come in. FML

#21486506
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25566) - you deserved it (1840)

On 10/31/2015 at 1:19pm - misc - by guessthatsatrickthen (woman) - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, a tailgating idiot rear-ended me at a red light, then had the balls to say it was my fault for "driving too close" to his car. FML

#21486416
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23325) - you deserved it (1333)

On 10/31/2015 at 6:20am - misc - by fuck off you fucking shitburglar (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I decided it was time to have "the talk" with my daughter, after I found a thong in the washing machine. She denied it was hers and pointed out how it was too big to fit her. I ended up having a very different talk with my son. FML

#21485867
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27392) - you deserved it (2743)

On 10/29/2015 at 4:02pm - kids - by caroline (woman) - Germany

Today, I got fired from my job a week before I started my new position in a different area of the company. My supervisor found out I was going to be making more money than her. FML

#21485734
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26537) - you deserved it (1490)

On 10/29/2015 at 6:20am - work - by cpizzle12 - United States (Virginia)



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