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sssnaaple

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sssnaaple

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 142
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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sssnaaple's page activity

Visits<b>tacojauns</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 1:30pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 03/30/2013 at 9:40am<b>DetroitDov</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 11:45am

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I agree, their lives suck

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sssnaaple's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

#20636996
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60807) - you deserved it (7098)

On 05/02/2013 at 2:27pm - love - by Jes_jes18 (woman) - United States

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

#20632794
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59328) - you deserved it (7747)

On 04/30/2013 at 2:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39160) - you deserved it (10345)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30181) - you deserved it (4927)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML

#20458013
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33738) - you deserved it (2777)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

#20451178
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39119) - you deserved it (5385)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50311) - you deserved it (4838)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34262) - you deserved it (2766)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22391) - you deserved it (6697)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35908) - you deserved it (5072)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was sleeping on an airplane. I dreamed that I was running my hands up and down my friend's leg sexually to creep him out. I woke up and I realized that I was running my hand up and down the leg of the old man sitting next to me. FML

#20408734
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37638) - you deserved it (22982)

On 12/20/2012 at 9:49am - intimacy - by joyness (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33131) - you deserved it (19055)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

#20401192
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22687) - you deserved it (5245)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

#20199342
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26745) - you deserved it (6291)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)



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