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ssavari8's FML badges
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ssavari8's favorite FMLs
by Andrew / 07/14/2015 at 1:59pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, I was late for work, so I grabbed my handbag, my sports bag and ran out. The bus arrived at the stop just as I did, so I hopped on and sat down, trying to catch my breath. I dumped my bags onto my knees and looked down to see my cat, staring back at me from inside my sports bag. FML
by matou / 07/09/2015 at 4:41pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 06/27/2015 at 12:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/02/2015 at 9:34pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
by Anon / 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML
by WolfAvenge / 05/21/2015 at 4:01am / United States (Arizona) / Love
Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML
by HiddlePuff / 05/14/2015 at 8:42am / Australia / Work
by Suicidal_Divide / 05/06/2015 at 3:25pm / United States (California) / Kids
by NoCnNoJustice / 04/17/2015 at 9:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML
by anonymous / 03/25/2015 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML
by greatly disturbed / 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML
by Sarah1330 / 02/24/2015 at 11:33pm / United States / Animals
Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML
by Anonymous / 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm / Denmark / Miscellaneous
Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML
by TheKingKen / 02/13/2015 at 3:40am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
- Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and… Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to… Today, my boyfriend figured out that he can bounce small things off of my boobs, and has been doing…