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ssavari8

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ssavari8

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  • Number of visits : 196
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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ssavari8's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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ssavari8's favorite FMLs

Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML

#21363021
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25385) - you deserved it (2695)

On 02/24/2015 at 11:33pm - animals - by Sarah1330 (woman) - United States

Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML

#21356659
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32688) - you deserved it (2693)

On 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML

Today, I announced to my friends that my grandmother is dying. My best friend pulled out his phone and casually announced, "Technically, everyone is dying." FML

#21354746
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26894) - you deserved it (2458)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:16pm - health - by Dartfrogger - United States (Utah)

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18629) - you deserved it (35348)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my pet lizard eating my other pet lizard. FML

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38296) - you deserved it (3297)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, three weeks after my sister took in a wounded porcupine from our backyard and let it roam about the house, I learned that it sheds quills from time to time. How did I learn this? By stepping on three of said quills hidden in the carpet. I still have only managed to pull one out. FML

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

#21334215
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26234) - you deserved it (1915)

On 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend bought a new toaster. It not only pops up the bread when done, it also beeps loudly. It makes me scream in terror every single time. My boyfriend has now vowed to "Toast 'til the end of time." It's going to be a long year. FML

Today, I was sitting at my computer, petting one of my cats, who was sitting on my lap. My other cat got jealous and tried to climb onto my lap as well. They ended up fighting. I was wearing shorts. FML

#21333736
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27401) - you deserved it (3679)

On 01/09/2015 at 1:44am - animals - by Crazy Cat Guy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML

#21325566
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34353) - you deserved it (2806)

On 12/27/2014 at 10:50pm - love - by Twysted91 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got 3 different rejection letters mailed to me from the same college. FML

#21320043
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33326) - you deserved it (2845)

On 12/18/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by ai_lauren (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35111) - you deserved it (6738)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34555) - you deserved it (3456)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)



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Friday 27 February 2015

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