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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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squiggles1020

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squiggles1020
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2609
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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squiggles1020's favorite FMLs

Today, after thirteen years of engagement, my fiance and I split. As is, with the day, we changed our facebook relationships to make it official. I logged back on tonight to find his mother, the woman I've spent the last year looking after and having a good time, 'liking' the break up. FML

#5269960 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (29248) - you deserved it (5061)

On 09/15/2009 at 8:10am - love - by ohIlike (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dentist asked me about my fillings, so I told him that when I was younger, I had 2 cavities. He replied, "No you didn't. I just looked at your x-rays." Turns out my old dentist ripped me off. I never needed fillings. FML

#5061381 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (33911) - you deserved it (1349)

On 09/05/2009 at 2:16pm - health - by itsjustnotfair (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, when we were at wrestling practice, we had to bend over to stretch. When I bent down, I noticed a car on the street stopped. There was a sixty year old man watching us. He then licked his lips and drove away. FML

#5001018 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (31935) - you deserved it (2698)

On 09/02/2009 at 4:07pm - work - by iceman123432 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (38542) - you deserved it (11325)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" . I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML

#4970470 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (31064) - you deserved it (10125)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:30am - health - by pussyOUT (man) - United States

Today, I was in an unfamiliar building on campus and I needed to use the bathroom before class started. I walked in and saw a man at the sink. I said "Oh my god I'm sorry! I thought this was the women's washroom." It was. The very butch looking woman gave me a look of death. FML

#4957088 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (31231) - you deserved it (7095)

On 08/31/2009 at 5:18pm - misc - by Cherie (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (16458) - you deserved it (27809)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML

#4717200 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (25215) - you deserved it (6624)

On 08/21/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by Becky (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

#4713882 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (28199) - you deserved it (2851)

On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

#4570183 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (49976) - you deserved it (3217)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:58am - intimacy - by bunny (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

#4555505 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (47580) - you deserved it (1848)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the movies alone after the boy I was seeing told me he was busy studying for exams. I found him making out with another girl whilst in the queue. When I confronted him by text he denied that it was him. I saw him check the text and reply. FML

#4545091 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (37805) - you deserved it (2955)

On 08/15/2009 at 6:22am - misc - by pink_cupcakes - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

#4539697 (372)

I agree, your life sucks (86650) - you deserved it (3588)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

#4531515 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (10177)

On 08/14/2009 at 6:28pm - money - by scfead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML

#4508324 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (67502) - you deserved it (1586)

On 08/13/2009 at 7:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)