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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 512
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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spontaneousxlove's page activity

Visits<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/20/2011 at 12:27am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:13pm<b>erpaderp</b> - the 09/06/2011 at 10:04pm<b>sourgirl101</b> - the 08/31/2011 at 6:10am<b>SteveD92</b> - the 08/29/2011 at 6:31pm<b>TheMadScientist</b> - the 07/18/2011 at 3:18pm

spontaneousxlove's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of spontaneousxlove's badges

spontaneousxlove's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML

by Hailey Antone / 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to Give Head". It also said "Have a nice day!" FML

by thismakesmesad / 09/07/2011 at 12:16pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

by CHStennis_4 / 09/03/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I went to a movie and a dinner with a girl. During dinner, she excused herself to go to the bathroom, so I checked my social media feeds while waiting for her to return. She'd posted on her twitter "Worst. Ever." I thought it was going well. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 4:56pm / United States / Love

Today, while bitching some girl out for spilling coffee all over me, she looks at me with accepting eyes and says after I'd finished, "I can understand your anger, big girls like you get grumpy when they're hungry." FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2011 at 5:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

by vishuzzbabe77 / 08/22/2011 at 2:04am / United States / Animals

Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML

by kaitylait / 08/18/2011 at 8:59pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Health

Today, my girlfriend got a necklace from one of her guy friends. She loves it. It's a heart shaped necklace. She doesn't see a problem. FML

by CashChamp20 / 08/17/2011 at 2:19am / United States / Love

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

by sydneybourgeois / 08/13/2011 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, while zooming down the interstate, I had to tell my husband to put his penis away. FML

by Wife / 08/07/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

by FML! / 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, even though I made the point of tanning naked, I still got tan lines thanks to my fat rolls. FML

by Username / 08/05/2011 at 3:06pm / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

by INside / 08/02/2011 at 12:52am / United States (New York) / Intimacy