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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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spongebobrocks

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spongebobrocks
  • Town/Country : Massachusetts
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 March 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 6930
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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spongebobrocks's favorite FMLs

Today, I was informed by my doctor that my stomach lining is inflamed, causing me to vomit almost every time I eat. Oh, and I'm allergic to the only medication to treat it. FML

#5269249 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (45950) - you deserved it (1510)

On 09/15/2009 at 6:16am - health - by Dylan (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the guy I've been dating tells me that I need to stop hanging on him in public because it's ruining his game with other girls. FML

#4909488 (313)

I agree, your life sucks (37368) - you deserved it (3932)

On 08/29/2009 at 4:42pm - love - by Intheway (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

#4845223 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (50355) - you deserved it (2049)

On 08/26/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by AreYouSerious (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I've been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I'm allergic to sweat. I'm a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML

#4712230 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (32524) - you deserved it (2528)

On 08/21/2009 at 4:17pm - health - by FilthyIke (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date with a girl. She drove while texting someone then stopped at a house and told me to wait in the car. She left her phone so I looked at the last text and it says "I'm here for the quicky". Our "date" was a decoy to throw her mom off so she could sleep with another guy. FML

#3877886 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (54964) - you deserved it (2917)

On 07/19/2009 at 8:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter asked me what the youngest age you should start having sex is, being a good mother I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh...shoot." and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML

#3344863 (484)

I agree, your life sucks (59159) - you deserved it (8376)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was getting a pedicure and the woman sitting next to me asked the lady if she could take the skin she had scraped off my feet home to her birds because they love skin. She then describes for 20 minutes how her birds love to sit on her when her sunburn is peeling and eat her skin. FML

#3199302 (294)

I agree, your life sucks (65733) - you deserved it (2326)

On 06/25/2009 at 4:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 months found out she was 4 months pregnant with her ex's baby. She told me I could leave her and she wouldn't blame me, but I decided to stay with her. She told me she loved me and then dumped me because she needed to be with her baby's daddy. FML

#3042247 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (43456) - you deserved it (4357)

On 06/19/2009 at 9:12pm - love - by thissucks (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

#2855395 (406)

I agree, your life sucks (64133) - you deserved it (2230)

On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

#2796619 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (80404) - you deserved it (6664)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:51am - money - by TSampson (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was playing a medieval game with my brother, when he took all of his character's clothes off and said, "Let's have sex!" I looked at him and said, "UH YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" He turns and looks at me, smiling and says, "But not in the game!" I am a 19 year old girl. He is 12. FML

#2780499 (313)

I agree, your life sucks (59638) - you deserved it (3346)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Sylvania - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it was my girlfriends birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

#2754553 (217)

I agree, your life sucks (64986) - you deserved it (4089)

On 06/09/2009 at 8:13pm - love - by SURPRISE (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML

#2736001 (253)

I agree, your life sucks (67657) - you deserved it (3587)

On 06/09/2009 at 4:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML

#2545642 (322)

I agree, your life sucks (113840) - you deserved it (4211)

On 06/02/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by guamfml - Guam

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729 (720)

I agree, your life sucks (164078) - you deserved it (74988)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)