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spnmemories

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  • Number of visits : 124
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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spnmemories's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25229) - you deserved it (7544)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML

#20159880
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31766) - you deserved it (1953)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:12am - misc - by BulldogHoops - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23486) - you deserved it (2418)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with my girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward 2 hours of my life. FML

#20148134
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32101) - you deserved it (3852)

On 11/04/2012 at 10:26pm - love - by Tj Hunt - United States

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24252) - you deserved it (13666)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29722) - you deserved it (6034)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I was babysitting four kids. I turned the TV on for them, and set the youngest on my lap. She started giggling and pointing at every single pimple I have, exclaiming "Boo-boo!" This went on for half an hour. FML

#20114676
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18634) - you deserved it (2691)

On 10/13/2012 at 7:22am - kids - by Shiverice - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24838) - you deserved it (2546)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

#20069063
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32375) - you deserved it (3728)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML

#20068225
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11226) - you deserved it (24046)

On 09/11/2012 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by Iguana (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was so desperate for any kind of male romantic attention that I googled "prison pen pals", and I'm considering writing to one. FML

#20033437
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10031) - you deserved it (21047)

On 08/21/2012 at 4:39am - love - by desperategurl (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML

#19739017
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22977) - you deserved it (7058)

On 06/05/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Damn (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

#19531197
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7193) - you deserved it (29749)

On 04/26/2012 at 6:44am - work - by NoPrivacy (woman) - United States

Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML

#19525636
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18139) - you deserved it (9261)

On 04/25/2012 at 12:50am - misc - by unfortunate (woman) - Sweden

Today, I found out I have a kidney infection. Now I'm forced to drink at least 4 glasses of water before going to bed. I also have to be woken up every two hours to be told to, "GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!" by my mother. FML

#19520981
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23924) - you deserved it (1855)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:50am - health - by hottygirl905 - United States (Florida)



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