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spjev

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spjev

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spjev's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

#20706140
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84978) - you deserved it (8101)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by ._. (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109369) - you deserved it (6563) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years tell his friend he was going to "pop the question". Ecstatic, I wore my nicest dress and got my hair done for dinner. Near the end, he leant in romantically and asked if we could start doing anal. So much for marriage. FML

#14326662
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34887) - you deserved it (6919)

On 12/24/2010 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by snoozerlooser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my parents asked me if I had a nice time with my girlfriend at the amusement park I took her to yesterday. She was pretty freaked out by some of the rides so without thinking I said, "Yeah, but she sure is a screamer." My parents then exchange a look and say, "Oh trust us, we know." FML

#13836763
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12708) - you deserved it (27557)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML

#13697546
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35639) - you deserved it (7758)

On 11/03/2010 at 2:40am - intimacy - by spockswifey - United States

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (116088) - you deserved it (8809)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States



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