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speckledots

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speckledots

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speckledotsspeckledots
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 September 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1168
  • Number of comments : 134
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About speckledots : Aloha people. My name is Heather. Sarcasm is my forte and I enjoy a good laugh. I'm a country girl at heart and I love music, animals, and books.
I am currently going to school for nursing.
Questions or comments? Message away :)

speckledots's page activity

Visits<b>LordGrew</b> - 8 hours ago<b>LordGoober</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 10:14pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:05pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 1:44am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 2:57pm<b>adrianvons</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 1:45pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 8:14pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 12:17pm<b>sapphiregirly</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 2:41am<b>heather_caro</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 6:36pm<b>Manosapo</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 6:32pm<b>wang33334</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:25pm<b>orbit</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 4:44pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 5:07am<b>Bluemoonie</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 12:07am<b>danans</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:07am<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:40am<b>jaynna23</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:10pm

speckledots's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of speckledots's badges

speckledots's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

#20825465
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56115) - you deserved it (4915)

On 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by shampoomice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68261) - you deserved it (9006)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML

#20817997
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43744) - you deserved it (7718)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:29am - kids - by kimm1993 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51726) - you deserved it (11182)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61221) - you deserved it (4175)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44483) - you deserved it (8822)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44281) - you deserved it (32397) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57716) - you deserved it (6821)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44727) - you deserved it (8840)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found my cat dead on the road. I called my family and told them, and later buried the cat. Not long after I got done burying it, my cat walked up to me. I buried someone else's cat. FML

#20757856
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47874) - you deserved it (9968)

On 07/01/2013 at 12:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51351) - you deserved it (7009)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML

#20156617
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21118) - you deserved it (2784)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada

Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML

#20098400
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22221) - you deserved it (3153)

On 10/02/2012 at 2:27pm - work - by friendlessatwork (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21932) - you deserved it (12252)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I helped my friend, who is a slob, move out of my house. I found the source of the funky smell she's been complaining about, under her bed. It was her vibrator. I found it with my bare hands. I had to bleach my hands twice and I still don't feel clean. FML

#20081199
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31968) - you deserved it (2320)

On 09/20/2012 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by MistressSuzuka (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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