- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Not specified
- Birth Date : Friday 23 February 1945 (71 years old)
- <3 status : Single
- Number of visits : 1149
- Number of comments : 100
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted
About spatula232 : ...
About spatula232 : ...
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
by nnniii / 11/15/2015 at 11:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/21/2015 at 8:12am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting outside in a pair of shorts. After about 15 minutes of getting weird looks from people, I realized my cock was sticking out of a hole that wasn't in my shorts when I put them on. FML
by soulaar / 10/02/2015 at 10:22am / Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) / Miscellaneous
by Thank God I Flush Them Down The Toilet / 09/25/2015 at 9:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML
by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up panting and drenched in sweat from a horrible nightmare. I'd been dreaming that bright, colored shapes were falling from the sky and I couldn't make them all neatly align with one another on the ground. I guess I should stop playing so much Tetris before bed. FML
by I love L / 08/08/2015 at 6:56pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Kids
Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years a few months ago, my boys convinced me to go out with the cute girl I had been talking to on Tinder. However, she wasn't cute, or a girl. He robbed me. FML
by Anonymous / 07/09/2015 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML
by roadie42 / 05/24/2015 at 11:15pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals
Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML
by Anonymous / 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm / Australia / Intimacy
by Sarah / 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
by cherokeems / 03/26/2015 at 1:44pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML
by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML
by fuckered519 / 12/06/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy