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spastiksarcastic

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spastiksarcastic

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 July 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1008
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About spastiksarcastic : so much swag

spastiksarcastic's page activity

Visits<b>Rachmini</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 7:08pm<b>ballerinaaub</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 12:28am<b>Shiningstartp</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 3:58pm<b>LimeSharpie</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 1:21am<b>bitchwhore</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 4:01pm<b>profoundkisses</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 12:58pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 8:02pm<b>DingoCJ</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 12:08pm<b>Miss_Attitude96</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 1:31pm<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 10:25pm<b>c00lsk8erboi</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 10:01pm<b>jangalianxi</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 2:30am<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/09/2012 at 11:00pm<b>BIGASSTITS</b> - the 02/22/2012 at 3:01am<b>mstangchck</b> - the 01/25/2012 at 2:28am<b>ChaosAngel17</b> - the 01/11/2012 at 11:07pm<b>glittercookies</b> - the 01/06/2012 at 1:35pm<b>Dark__Angel66</b> - the 01/05/2012 at 8:18pm

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spastiksarcastic's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend informed me that my vagina reminds him of ham. But that's okay, because ham is his favorite food. FML

#18704788
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30690) - you deserved it (4971)

On 01/04/2012 at 7:32am - intimacy - by thankzbabe (woman) - United States

Today, my friend set me up with a cute guy who is very germaphobic. So, I spent 4 hours cleaning my apartment. 2 minutes into the date, I sneezed. He politely told me he wasn't feeling well and left. FML

#18669836
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28223) - you deserved it (3142)

On 01/01/2012 at 12:41am - love - by upsetandannoyed - United States (New York)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52206) - you deserved it (10688)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I love him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

#18657042
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42961) - you deserved it (9114)

On 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by KrissyBearr - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

#18622040
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36662) - you deserved it (9336)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:11am - intimacy - by ikungfuyou (man) - United States

Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML

#18591891
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27693) - you deserved it (3320)

On 12/23/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by ThinZ (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML

#18561391
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16443) - you deserved it (52527)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad came to pick me up early for the Christmas break. He walked in on me cleaning all 19 of my sex toys. That's more than one sex toy per year that I've lived. I now have to face a 7-hour drive from Montreal to Toronto with him. FML

#18540985
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15132) - you deserved it (38934)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by Une Fille (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mother hacked my Facebook and broke up with my boyfriend and pretended to be me. She told him if he ever talks to me again, she'll call the cops. FML

#18518838
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34815) - you deserved it (3426)

On 12/15/2011 at 10:20am - love - by NinjaWafflesx (woman) - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

#18513189
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19946) - you deserved it (25105)

On 12/14/2011 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked into my bathroom to find my girlfriend applying my deodorant. This would have been fine, if she wasn't applying it to her mouth. I don't think deodorant helps with bad breath, but a quick Google search shows that it does help with herpes. FML

#18506828
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41284) - you deserved it (3057)

On 12/13/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by neednewdeoderant - United States (Michigan)

Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML

#18496344
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30591) - you deserved it (2567)

On 12/12/2011 at 6:17pm - intimacy - by flowerchildd2 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48470) - you deserved it (7719)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML

#18474670
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45418) - you deserved it (12007)

On 12/10/2011 at 7:03am - intimacy - by Anonymousss95 - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML

#18460733
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21191) - you deserved it (29107)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm - misc - by picklemonger - Canada



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