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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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sparklestar69

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sparklestar69
  • Town/Country : Your bfs panties:), Guadalupe
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 October 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 646
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About sparklestar69 : I love funny people and I enjoy a nice blunt :)


Holla at ya girl! Hahah blow me ;)

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sparklestar69's favorite FMLs

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643 (244)

I agree, your life sucks (37315) - you deserved it (7185)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

#8921523 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (20811) - you deserved it (2293)

On 03/08/2010 at 3:54pm - love - by HaleyIsabelle - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

#8793926 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (20233) - you deserved it (2173)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by victoriassecret - United States

Today, my mother walked in on my boyfriend licking whipped cream off my nipples. FML

#8663511 (447)

I agree, your life sucks (8256) - you deserved it (15156)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by hannah12345 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that my boyfriend joined a group on Facebook called 'Swallow. Or it's going in your eye.' Today I also found out that my boyfriend takes Facebook groups very seriously. FML

#8439216 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (12738) - you deserved it (2845)

On 02/19/2010 at 9:27am - intimacy - by kit_kat14 (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

#8202300 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (26953) - you deserved it (2204)

On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States

Today, my doctor put me on some extra strength antibiotics for an infection. On the label it says "WARNING: may cause Diarrhea"... 'may cause' is a funny term... this is the second time I've sharted in my pants today. FML

#8153486 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (16097) - you deserved it (2348)

On 02/12/2010 at 12:11am - health - by NotSoSick (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

#7776158 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (8264) - you deserved it (22896)

On 02/01/2010 at 9:34am - animals - by adad - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873 (440)

I agree, your life sucks (72174) - you deserved it (7429)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML

#7718053 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (19691) - you deserved it (2615)

On 01/30/2010 at 7:32pm - misc - by hahahawoww (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the McDonalds drive-thru getting my morning coffee, when some guy slammed into the back of my car. I'm so happy I was holding the cup between my legs at that very moment, because now I have 2nd degree burns on my lady parts. FML

#6151302 (172)

I agree, your life sucks (28991) - you deserved it (5083)

On 11/04/2009 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML

#1957441 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (33434) - you deserved it (1486)

On 05/15/2009 at 3:20am - work - by RunningMurphy (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me because he loves toilets. Everyone was sleeping so I went pee but didnt flush. My cat jumped onto the seat and fell in. I had to lift him out and then wash him. He hates water though, so I was scratched by my cat who was dripping with my own pee. FML

#1620980 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (19011)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:37am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)