About soysauce1208 : not a creeper.just a keeper:).go ahead and message me.oohhh yeahhh, tee-hee. :))
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (4376)
On 01/27/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Scaredwitless (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48191) - you deserved it (5263)
On 01/27/2011 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by JordanVilleneuve (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35209) - you deserved it (2973)
On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my parents, not trusting me and my boyfriend, told us to call them in the middle of our movie so they could hear it, and prove we weren't up to no good. Well, I called. Just as a raging sex scene started. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25103) - you deserved it (8685)
On 01/25/2011 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by totallyscrewedomg - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years has been cheating on me with a Realtor. The same Realtor who helped me sell my condo so I could move in with my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22467) - you deserved it (1898)
On 01/25/2011 at 1:10am - intimacy - by raaquel - United States
Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14704) - you deserved it (43389)
On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43771) - you deserved it (4114)
On 01/22/2011 at 8:00am - intimacy - by fmlalways - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)
Today, my friends and I were messing around with an app on my phone that makes your picture look fat. My picture looked the same before and after. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22536) - you deserved it (7245)
On 01/22/2011 at 12:53am - misc - by Peter C. - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my friends and I were messing around with an app on my phone that makes your picture look fat. My picture looked the same before and after. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22536) - you deserved it (7245)
On 01/22/2011 at 12:53am - misc - by Peter C. - United States (Minnesota)
Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21372) - you deserved it (4761)
On 01/22/2011 at 12:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was chosen by my coworkers to explain to my elderly boss that ''tossing the salad'' isn't another expression for saying ''brainstorming''. She didn't believe me. Guess we will all keep ''tossing the salad'' for new ideas each afternoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16773) - you deserved it (2133)
On 01/20/2011 at 1:01am - intimacy - by welly223 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my boyfriend spent an hour lecturing me on how I need to ask for what I want. So I asked him to delete a crappy picture he'd taken of me the night before. His response: "No, you don't always get what you want." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19493) - you deserved it (7129)
On 01/19/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by ugh (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out that it's extremely difficult to take a dump while holding a cup under your ass for a lab specimen. I also found out that you get so nervous that you can actually forget to lock the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19392) - you deserved it (3972)
On 01/19/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Lebanon
Today, I drove to buy new sneakers to work out and lose weight. Coming out of the store, I saw someone had parked too close to me. I had to beg a stranger to back my car out for me, because no matter how I tried, I couldn't get into the driver's seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17661) - you deserved it (7354)
On 01/19/2011 at 1:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7804) - you deserved it (25322)
On 01/19/2011 at 12:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Monday 20 May 2013
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