About sovetskiy : Welcome everyone! Here's a brief summary of myself. Im from Filth-adelphia yo. This place truly is a shit hole, but I love it just the way it is. I get made fun of because of my accent. My favorite color is brown. My favorite band is Pink Floyd. Hablo español y ich spreche Deutsch. I love talking to people... So contact me somehow :D
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Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10551) - you deserved it (32422)
On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22505) - you deserved it (12957)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16150) - you deserved it (28387)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25051) - you deserved it (6018)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML
I agree, your life sucks (5582) - you deserved it (42225)
On 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I came to terms with the fact that my boss owns my soul for the bare minimum wage, and has me so whipped that he probably will for the rest of eternity, or until his ancient, withered, necromantic ass dies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9252) - you deserved it (18239)
On 08/04/2011 at 2:47pm - work - by Username - United States
Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10895) - you deserved it (41746)
On 08/04/2011 at 9:41am - kids - by makeitstop (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32660) - you deserved it (11852)
On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I ran over a chipmunk. On my bike. Its mangled carcass got caught in the spokes and decided to join me on my ride. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21693) - you deserved it (8346)
On 06/13/2011 at 12:22am - misc - by cycler - United States
Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13765) - you deserved it (30778)
On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States
Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39179) - you deserved it (4277)
On 05/25/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Brilliant... (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8151) - you deserved it (174842)
On 05/21/2011 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)
Today, I discovered my wife has a YouTube channel dedicated to 20 second videos of her wearing a fake mustache and making weird sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35900) - you deserved it (6285)
On 05/07/2011 at 9:56am - love - by wtfiswrongwithher - Australia (Queensland)
Today, the landlord of our building constructed a bathroom in the space under the stairs, outside my office, on the other side of a thin wall. He must have some kind of bowel disorder, because now I get to hear the sounds of his loud, wet and gassy pooping several times per day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19799) - you deserved it (1618)
On 04/22/2011 at 10:26am - work - by op-poopy - Canada (Ontario)
Friday 24 May 2013
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