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Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9493) - you totally deserved it (9740)
On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39775) - you totally deserved it (3713)
On 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by NoFriends - United States (New Hampshire)
Today my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38896) - you totally deserved it (6145)
On 07/04/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Cococautly (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38277) - you totally deserved it (3850)
On 06/27/2009 at 10:29am - love - by a_B_c_D_e_F_g (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61759) - you totally deserved it (2937)
On 06/27/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan
Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31493) - you totally deserved it (12844)
On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)
Today, Michael Jackson died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75782) - you totally deserved it (51854)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was visiting my friends new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughters. I'm a 37 year old male. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20669) - you totally deserved it (3992)
On 06/24/2009 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16541) - you totally deserved it (43856)
On 06/23/2009 at 10:37pm - health - by FattyMcFatterson (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I discovered that the hearing in my left ear is still good. I haven't been able to hear that well out of it for 2 weeks and I thought I popped an eardrum and waited for it to heal. I stuck a Q-Tip in there to clean it out. Turns out there was actually a dead fly in my ear. For 2 weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38041) - you totally deserved it (6121)
On 06/22/2009 at 9:13pm - health - by JK710 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I visited my grandma. She offered me some chips in ziploc bag. I thought they were sour cream and onion chips from the look. They tasted funny, but I didn't want to be rude and I kept eating. I looked closer after a while and noticed that what I thought were chives was actually mold. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you totally deserved it (5405)
On 06/22/2009 at 1:43am - health - by badeats (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30500) - you totally deserved it (19699)
On 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got on my flight for my brother's graduation in Portland, Maine. Unable to find my mom in the airport, a stranger overheard my dilemma and informed me I was in Portland, Oregon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17672) - you totally deserved it (14063)
On 06/16/2009 at 4:26am - misc - by Rayyy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42267) - you totally deserved it (2071)
On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I reached into my fridge to grab a strawberry soda. I noticed the can had started to leak from the top so I slurped up the spilt red liquid on the top of the can. I realized it wasn't soda, but blood from a defrosting steak on the shelf above it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34803) - you totally deserved it (12623)
On 06/16/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by kjmsit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
