Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

soulebelius

Search for a member

soulebelius
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1467
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

soulebelius's last visitors

lolthatnoobmelonssuslordAlexthegreat475capsizedatseaLilxpieMcNikkireply_wlyricsolpally

soulebelius's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of soulebelius's badges

soulebelius's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15442) - you deserved it (43156) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

#18036176
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6449) - you deserved it (46949)

On 10/21/2011 at 12:57am - misc - by crankg - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22904) - you deserved it (3031)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

#17927200
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21699) - you deserved it (2805)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:58am - work - by Dr.Octopus454 (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15587) - you deserved it (7569)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML

#17916537
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11967) - you deserved it (24129)

On 10/05/2011 at 11:59pm - health - by pixiebubz - Australia

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23744) - you deserved it (2104)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Devastated, he withered onto the floor into an inconsolable wreck in front of dozens of people. The ribbon of embarrassment that went down my spine was too much for me to handle, so I had to tell him I was "only joking." FML

#17901380
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11344) - you deserved it (37019)

On 10/04/2011 at 1:22am - love - by backtosquareone - Asia/Pacific Region

Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML

#17877097
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23250) - you deserved it (5352)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, at the end of my shift with a long line of customers, the older woman I was checking out calmly said, "You should take a minute to fix your hair dear, we have all been talking about it while we waited." FML

#17818290
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19141) - you deserved it (2340)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:21am - work - by Cashier (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML

#17815777
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23251) - you deserved it (4743)

On 09/23/2011 at 8:32pm - misc - by yeah_im_mad_bro - Canada (Ontario)

Today, like always, my parents are such tightwads that they refused to turn the heating system on, despite the ball-freezing temperatures. I was so cold, I had to resort to warming my hands up over the toaster. FML

#17812468
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22612) - you deserved it (3145)

On 09/23/2011 at 10:33am - health - by freezingggg - Reserved

Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML

#17811635
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36950) - you deserved it (10972)

On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML

#17810986
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32132) - you deserved it (7289)

On 09/23/2011 at 2:22am - love - by drastech99 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

#17775098
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17218) - you deserved it (2304)

On 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm - love - by DeadScared (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: