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softpaws

Offline (the 02/02/2016 at 5:04am) | Search for a member

softpaws

28Fucked!

softpawssoftpaws
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1520
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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softpaws's page activity

Visits<b>sheeshadevil</b> - yesterday at 8:29pm<b>AnAngryyGiraffe</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 1:09am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 10:19am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 1:14am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:45am<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 11:00am<b>colton_colton</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 9:30am<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 7:11am<b>gigistar15</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 10:34pm<b>hansky</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 3:57pm<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 4:39am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 10:51am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 7:16am<b>gmkerere</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 4:10pm<b>kylie31</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 3:45pm<b>fzckinq</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 3:23pm<b>Seashells77</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 12:06pm<b>Kendrah18</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:21pm

Fucked!<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 3:54pm<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:40am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 12:13pm<b>gmkerere</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 10:10pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 4:51am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 1:20am<b>orios105</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 1:13pm<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 6:40pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 10:02pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:12pm<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 8:08am<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 9:41pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:10pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:56pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:47pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:50pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:59pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:11pm

softpaws's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of softpaws's badges

softpaws's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

#20078825
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34458) - you deserved it (2579)

On 09/19/2012 at 2:24am - intimacy - by annonymous - United States

Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML

#20077962
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48794) - you deserved it (6922)

On 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm - health - by GMD (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

#20076781
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20291) - you deserved it (22217)

On 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm - work - by Mrs. Teacher (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

#20076675
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28831) - you deserved it (2655)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by wtf yourself, cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML

#20074793
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27027) - you deserved it (2612)

On 09/16/2012 at 3:48pm - health - by Derp McShitstain (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27905) - you deserved it (3163)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was called into my son's school because he had got into a fist-fight with another pupil and I had to take him home. He clammed up about the reason behind the fight, until I finally managed to coax it out of him: the other kid is in "Hufflepuff" and he's in "Ravenclaw." FML

#20070089
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27461) - you deserved it (4299)

On 09/13/2012 at 10:31am - kids - by PissOffPottermore (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

#20069063
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36509) - you deserved it (4138)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

#20069063
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36509) - you deserved it (4138)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had just bought a new $60 basketball and decided to go try it out. Five minutes into playing, the ball decided to roll into the hands of a little girl, who then said, "Mine". I thought it was cute, until she skipped over to her parent's car and they drove off. FML

#20068584
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32669) - you deserved it (5308)

On 09/12/2012 at 4:52am - kids - by Bitchjackedmyball - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27458) - you deserved it (4003)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50114) - you deserved it (4325)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dentist dropped my bite plate for x-rays on the ground, picked it up, looked at it intently, took a couple of hairs off, and shoved it back into my mouth. FML

#20068205
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27625) - you deserved it (2161)

On 09/11/2012 at 10:24pm - health - by ledentist - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

#20067114
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26007) - you deserved it (2555)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML

#20066447
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23115) - you deserved it (7668)

On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States



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