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softpaws

Offline (the 08/20/2015 at 4:08pm) | Search for a member

softpaws

19Fucked!

softpawssoftpaws
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1021
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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softpaws's page activity

Visits<b>insanecutie</b> - 16 hours ago<b>schreibergx93</b> - yesterday at 8:22pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 11:12am<b>Kriebel89</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:35am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:56pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:07am<b>HeidiZiggler</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:49pm<b>gay_flavored_cx</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:53pm<b>R2Y2</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 1:51am<b>Crazyjohnb</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:50pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 8:15pm<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:08am<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 2:18pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 1:08pm<b>julia_adamec</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 9:55am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 8:56am<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 8:14am<b>Katluv4566</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:39pm

Fucked!<b>insanecutie</b> - 17 hours ago<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:12pm<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 8:08am<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 9:41pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:10pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:56pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:47pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:50pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:59pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:11pm<b>hansky</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 9:38pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 12:33pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:25am<b>marshm610</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:27am<b>JDSini</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:09am<b>boostedc</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:52am<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:34am<b>Tander</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 5:03pm

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softpaws's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32819) - you deserved it (15408)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41054) - you deserved it (3458)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44195) - you deserved it (7504)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

#20460540
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43362) - you deserved it (4503)

On 01/15/2013 at 9:41am - kids - by Nightmare (woman) -

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49600) - you deserved it (8339)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35377) - you deserved it (8589)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

#20447919
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32629) - you deserved it (4540)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML

#20436663
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43429) - you deserved it (6105)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49501) - you deserved it (7303) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

#20426821
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35703) - you deserved it (26388)

On 12/27/2012 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by ohman (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54917) - you deserved it (7362)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84180) - you deserved it (25948)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40174) - you deserved it (5791)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49110) - you deserved it (26738)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50898) - you deserved it (10637)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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