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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I realized that I spend the same amount of money on my phone bill as I do on Nutella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5450) - you deserved it (15097)
On 10/19/2012 at 10:19am - health - by Nutellalover (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18800) - you deserved it (1988)
On 10/18/2012 at 2:19pm - misc - by not as scarred as he should be (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15909) - you deserved it (2686) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18848) - you deserved it (4575)
On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States
Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18444) - you deserved it (1728)
On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States
Today, I walked in on my brother sticking his erect penis through a donut. I doubt I'll ever be able to unsee this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24699) - you deserved it (1744)
On 10/12/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19106) - you deserved it (3447)
On 10/08/2012 at 3:14am - love - by stoych (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27121) - you deserved it (8810)
On 10/07/2012 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by Unfortunate (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend learned how to somersault. He now thinks that he's a ninja and somersaults into every room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13865) - you deserved it (3029)
On 10/07/2012 at 10:20am - love - by justabitembarrassed - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21032) - you deserved it (4558)
On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18619) - you deserved it (1270)
On 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I have so much ass-acne that it hurts to sit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21123) - you deserved it (4033)
On 10/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by Chamorru (man) - United States
Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am beyond terrified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16724) - you deserved it (1171)
On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing the Spiderman theme song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15010) - you deserved it (3108)
On 09/29/2012 at 5:14am - intimacy - by BabyG2222 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25973) - you deserved it (1611)
On 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by linn (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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