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sodapop83's favorite FMLs
Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML
by Anonymous / 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Washington) / Money
Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML
by Anonymous / 08/24/2014 at 1:51am / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/24/2014 at 12:14am / United States / Love
Today, after a long silent and awkward pause after asking my girlfriend's dad if I can take her on holiday for Christmas, he looked me dead in the eyes and said "No, you may not impregnate my daughter." FML
by Dafuq happen there / 08/23/2014 at 3:34am / South Africa / Intimacy
by Kev / 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by embarrassed / 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by FANZZY / 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Stellarum / 08/18/2014 at 11:13am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Kids
by Degueusement / 08/18/2014 at 12:48am / Intimacy
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
by you ripped them off ages ago / 08/17/2014 at 2:15am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids
Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML
by Anonymous / 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by BrokeBride / 08/14/2014 at 3:15am / United States (New Hampshire) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML
by lacieQ / 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm / Canada / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…
- Today, I was talking with my slightly skinflint girlfriend, who just moved in with me. “I think you… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was… Today, I’m in Rome for Halloween. I went out with few friends and spent the night with a man. The…