soccerstar1996

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soccerstar1996

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1676
  • Number of comments : 138
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About soccerstar1996 : .

soccerstar1996's page activity

Visits<b>alex997</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 3:12pm<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 9:22pm<b>ke_swag</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 3:25am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 2:55pm<b>Paras_800</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 9:08pm<b>Kitty_Kat16</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:18am<b>immaloser95</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 12:51am<b>waltwhitman</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:30pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:16pm<b>Snake1105</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 9:15am<b>tigerborn69</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 3:42pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 10:01pm<b>DrWafflez</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 10:07pm<b>konacoffee</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:08pm<b>Insane94</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:55am<b>ScottVining</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 5:28pm<b>warsun</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 4:38am<b>alexgabr</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 12:25pm

Fucked!<b>waltwhitman</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 4:30am

soccerstar1996's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of soccerstar1996's badges

soccerstar1996's favorite FMLs

Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML

by anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / Germany / Work

Today, I took my Spanish test, and I felt very confident. I got the test back later, and saw my teacher had written on it: "Congrats on the 94%, but I know you cheated." FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 12:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I removed the side rails from my truck because I didn't think I really needed them. An hour later, I went to Wal-Mart, forgot they were gone, and busted my ass in public while getting out of my truck. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 12:06pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my mother and I saw a stall selling colourful treats at the shopping centre. Some were placed on small dishes, so we thought we'd sample their goods. Turns out that the colourful goodies that we'd bit into were very creative pieces of soap. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 11:49am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

by methane overload / 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health

Today, I still can't decide whether masturbating while looking at myself makes me narcissistic or just plain pathetic. FML

by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 1:01pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML

by f*ck / 05/02/2012 at 12:22pm / United States / Love

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm / Australia / Health

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

by danii / 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

by ali grace / 05/14/2011 at 7:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

by -_- / 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

by verasam01 / 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

by person / 12/26/2010 at 12:59pm / Jordan (Amman Governorate) / Health