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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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soccer1788

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soccer1788
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 564
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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soccer1788's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML

#8507501 (79)

I agree, your life sucks (14240) - you deserved it (2953)

On 02/21/2010 at 3:44am - misc - by weirdo - United States (California)

Today, I was walking to work, when I slipped and landed on my tail bone. Worse still, my hot coffee went flying into my face. I currently can't see out of my left eye. FML

#8443667 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (14891) - you deserved it (1191)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:44pm - health - by corleon198425 - United States

Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around, she started squeezing my cheeks and told me I remind her of her son. FML

#8434762 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (12367) - you deserved it (1834)

On 02/19/2010 at 2:41am - intimacy - by Brett meek - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML

#8339859 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (7973) - you deserved it (1710)

On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML

#8299484 (266)

I agree, your life sucks (25048) - you deserved it (1865)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:08pm - love - by thirdwheel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started a new job, it was going well until I was asked to stand up and be introduced to a company director. I had a hard on. FML

#7928576 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (9504) - you deserved it (3283)

On 02/06/2010 at 4:29am - intimacy - by Bacular (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was talking to a female friend online. She was typing out a story bit by bit about how awful she was feeling after being teased. I was responding with "So, so true" but because of my slow typing it appeared after she wrote, "Doesn't help being fat." FML

#7927538 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (17501) - you deserved it (3781)

On 02/06/2010 at 3:17am - misc - by Oops (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my little sister asked me what she would look like when she got older. I told her that she would probably look a lot like me. She started to cry. FML

#7927518 (66)

I agree, your life sucks (23140) - you deserved it (2493)

On 02/06/2010 at 3:15am - kids - by Misty3242 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with the lights off. It was 1AM, and I'd just finished watching a scary movie, so I was a little paranoid. I was about to fall asleep, when an eerie light lit the room. I jumped, got tangled in the sheets, and hit my head against the bed frame. Where'd the light come from? Not a space ship. Not someone breaking in. It was my phone. FML

#7124695 (54)

I agree, your life sucks (5453) - you deserved it (15868)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on a plane. The person sitting next to me was using the plane's wifi, and was on Facebook. They joined the group 'I hate sitting next to fat people on airplanes'. FML

#6752282 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (26263) - you deserved it (7805)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:49pm - misc - by fatman (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was in line in the grocery store with my 3 year old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had a cow with sunglasses on on it. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (36042) - you deserved it (2055)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262 (431)

I agree, your life sucks (4362) - you deserved it (55693)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)