Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

snowflake12

Search for a member

snowflake12

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 146
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

snowflake12's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

snowflake12's favorite FMLs

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31472) - you deserved it (6340)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

#20423470
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39895) - you deserved it (4024)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15128) - you deserved it (34984)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

#20417856
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39806) - you deserved it (4061)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55496) - you deserved it (9868)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55496) - you deserved it (9868)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML

#20416192
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40706) - you deserved it (11891)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38668) - you deserved it (3135)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML

#19186705
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25758) - you deserved it (2136)

On 02/29/2012 at 12:30am - misc - by mandygeegoesnom - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML

#17471195
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30483) - you deserved it (3568)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

#13559030
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30630) - you deserved it (2490)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was missing $20 from my wallet, so I decided to ask my sister if she had taken it. Her response? "That reminds me, I need to borrow another 50." She has a job. That was my Christmas money. FML

#8297602
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22861) - you deserved it (2313)

On 02/15/2010 at 12:02pm - money - by Ambar - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told a girl she was beautiful on the inside and out. She still didn't sleep with me. FML

#7520375
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6582) - you deserved it (62920)

On 01/23/2010 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by MackeyBoy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went home early from a business trip to find my house covered with rose petals. Thinking it was a romantic notion from my boyfriend, I went up to the bedroom. I opened the door to find him lying there, getting it on with my sister. FML

#6005741
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30513) - you deserved it (2255)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Shobz (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

#4382309
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61636) - you deserved it (3548)

On 08/08/2009 at 9:42am - misc - by oshitdonotwant (woman) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: